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Burnley need £20m before June 30th then? I assume half the premier league is going to be putting a bid in for Trafford

It's fake.

Gillespie is basically the kid that befriends De Nero in that advert but expanded to the whole of NUFC.

I'm sorry but.. what does this even mean What is the implication he's taken from 'sleeping areas' that suggests the women would be under threat..? I mean maybe he's right but I'm struggling to find my way to his conclusion at the moment, at least one that would support saying "there are laws!"

Who's that daft cunt? (Poso, not Tom).

Gillespie is living the dream like

Retained players list has been announced. Wilson & Ruddy both out of contract but the club is in discussions with both and new contracts could still be agreed. Jamal Lewis is being released. Llloyd Kelly's permanent transfer to Juventus is confirmed. All other first team players retained. Gillespie has had the option to retain activiated.

Speaking of which

*googles two high agency males going at it*

Just got sent this it’s quite funny especially at the end with the Mackem

At this point I’m cheering for the asteroid

He is reliably looking after number one as always.

Anyone tried getting the magpie mover? Last season I included it when I got my season ticket but I don't think there was the option for next season. I'm trying to get one now and when I go to pay it just keeps saying declined by payment gateway. I've tried a few different cards and get the same message every time.

They haven't factored in the £250m prize money for winning last seasons Sela Cup.

He might want to be no.1 somewhere but if there's something in this the champions league might swing it...24, last year of contact, knows the league and is Brazilian so you'd imagine settling in might be fairly easy...it all makes sense, he's at least as good as peak Wilson...

Chelsea sold themselves a sack of balls for £290m.

Just how the fuck is this worked out?!

If that isn’t the hot Mitch summer, I don’t know what is

Linked with Muniz from Fulham as backup to Isak. He's got 12 months left on his contract I think so looks to be the budget (shitter) backup option to Delap/Joao Pedro. Same agency as Trippier.

So when do people think we will announce a first teamer?