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Time to pack it in lads. Just forfeit the rest of the season.

Some expectations need managing better in here like. We don’t have a right to be safe in the league, we are a newly promoted side which was barely strengthened in the summer. We have a below average premiership team and squad. If you had offered any of the newly promoted sides our position now at the start of the season they all would have snapped your hand off. Just because we used to be a great side (about 20 years ago) means the sum total of fuck all now. Staying up is all that matters, if that’s by goal difference on the last day then I couldn’t give less of a fuck.

How long is a piece of string?

No, of course 1 point from 6 games is poor, but this is the type of run most newly promoted teams suffer, Huddersfield have had 3 points from their last 6 games. In that run they were battered 4-0 by Bournemouth, 5-0 by Arsenal, and 3-0 by Liverpool. You also need to look at the sides we played in the last 6, Man Utd, Chelsea are games we weren’t going to fare well in, Watford and Burnley are strong sides that are both having a good season, Bournemouth are a capable side that started poor (see 4-0 hammering of Hudds) but that one was a disappointing match, the West Brom game was tight but we were probably the better side on balance and were playing away from home.

We’re also really missing our skipper and no one really mentions him but imo we are also missing Atsu .. he’s not amazing but he does a job and is pain in the arse for opposing teams.

it could be worse.. we could have Steve McClaren, Joe Kinnear or John Carver trying to sort out this little slump in form. As it stands we have a manager who is a cut above all those. And players with a bit of heart/fight, much more compared to our relegation seasons... We’re just lacking in quality versus the teams who spent money. It is what it is, for now. We will be ok. imo.

Adds a third option to the wiping standing up/sitting down debate, anyway.

Presumably there’s a hole in it’s seat, otherwise there’s some considerable buttering of cheeks going on here.

Doesn't change the fact that how other teams do is of utmost relevance to how Newcastle do. As for the path we're going down, I think we can all agree that .16ppg means mackem-level relegation, but a larger and more relevant sample would be the 1ppg achieved since the start of the season. That's right on the cusp of what's needed. It's going to be a long, hard season without pretty serious investment in January but we knew that.

Yes, yes I do have the mind of a small child.

Is it ironic that his head looks like a toilet brush ?

What an utter scruff.

How is it irrelevant what other teams around us do? I’d say it is very relevant. We were always going to be fighting relegation, we are a newly promoted side. What did you expect? That we’d be comfortable at this point? People starting to get on Benitez’s back is absolutely fucking absurd, but tbh Noelie was fucking absurd all of last season as well so I expect nothing less from him.

They don't call it the Bong Injector 2000 for nothing.

I can recommend the Travelodge at the Knutsford services on the M6. Widely regarded as the Gateway to the Lake District, and you can support the local economy by having dinner at the Burger King, the Greggs or both.

A Haven holiday camp btw. I'd rather drown in one of the lakes.