Howmanheyman

You wanted to be a keeper??!!

Stoichkov - Legend (Couple of blokes in my old club would rave about Green, mind. Also remember an old timer going on about Bobby Mitchell and to be honest I could listen to stuff like that all day long, especially when you're sitting around having a few pints.)

Know you're market, Tooj!

Now LM has gone is there many posters other than Noelie old enough to have seen Nattress play at SJP?

Whenever I see this thread and see the words 'Jordan' and 'cunt' I half expect to see a pic of her spreading her thighs. It's probably just me to be fair.

This is where Pardew's 'I'd like to fank Mike' patter comes back to bite him in the arse. He didn't look as confident as he normally is at his press conference the other day yet he just can't implore Ashley/Llambias publicly to get their fingers out.

He must have been thinking "what's this cunt on about?" the odd time our paths crossed from then on.

Don't forget to mention their weight, Stevie.

I shoulda put you and your graphs in. Bugger!

http://captiongenerator.com/2047/Toontastic

You know I called this lad Kenny from the off, from the distance of the corner to the East Stand as far as I was concerned it was him and he did say he used to have some banter with the corner/scoreboard. Kids, let this be a lesson.......Never drink at work.

No, that was someone else, go on 'pics of old thread'.

Well there was either two Kenny's or I've tarred the wrong lad with the wrong brush!

Legend.

Fucking Redknapp, man! His face is just made for daft gifs like.

Reading has the fattest people in the UK. Aston, Birmingham, Chelsea then Spurs are expected to overtake Reading in the UK fat table in the coming weeks. You heard it here first, folks.

Bravo, sir.

One of my mates got lifted for setting some bangers off in the corner and looking back it was quite funny as he had fuck all to do with it. Que the 'Harry Roberts' song being sung as the police lead him down the gangway in the corner with my mate saying 'here man it wasn't me!'

Argo-uaann, go-uaan, go-uaan!

I used to work at the Tyne Brewery until S&N disgracefully shut it in 2005 and temporarily moved to Dunston for a couple of years before moving Broon Ale production to Yorkshire. Anyway, towards the end of my time there one of my roles was QC, which involved me doing various tests on the hour with the beer quality and also collecting samples for tank changes etc. After every test I'd take a spare bottle, (extra if I fancied a 'gargle'), and label up the spare bottle and at the end of my shift I'd take the spare sample bottle over the Lab just so they could check my results weren't a fiction of my imagination. (cooking the books we called it). One morning around five I walked over to the Lab with my samples, stuck the crate on the table and said to to the kid with the white coat, 'Here's your samples from the bottler, mate'. The lad turned round, said 'cheers' and lo and behold it was Kenny Everet! 'Fucking hell! It's Kenny Everet!' I therefore said. He laughed and we had a bit of craic about us (the corner) and him (Kenny) and the banter that went back and forth. We would sing 'in the seats, in the seats' to get him and others to start a 'united' chant. If they didn't respond they got a 'get your flasks out for the lads' song, if Kenny stod up and responded we'd either join in or we'd let him start it off, not join in then give him the bird as he'd stand up giving us the V's and offering the whole of the corner on from the safety of his seat in the East Stand. It was great stuff, like. Turns out he was blobbing on my shift which explained why I'd never seen him around as the Brewery was canny big, had different depts and many shift patterns. His name was Stevie and he lived somewhere out in the sticks and was surrounded by Mackems at the time although in no way did he sound at all mackem. He was a good lad, like.

It's time for bed.

I loved the original, I just hope Affleck hasn't ruined it.

The Red Indian Geordie, always heard, never seen. How the fuck he managed to do it I don't know but you always smiled/laughed when you heard it. Class.