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Howmanheyman

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Everything posted by Howmanheyman

  1. Make the story about NUFC, did you say? Graeme Jones watch......
  2. Apparently Jeremy Clarkson is a Chelsea fan, (of course he is! ) and hired a private jet go go to the the CL cup final and got twatted by a Man City fan whilst in Portugal. What a shame.
  3. It would be cheaper to just pay him off by building a restaurant opposite his house which cooks anything, serves beer and fine wines, is for the sole use for him and guests 24/7 for life...... than letting him spend over a £100m a season.
  4. They reckon the MD of Papa John's is doing his nut and considering legal action against both players and Sunderland AFC.
  5. BBC news Dept: Manager: "Who did the Domino's employment story?" Employee: "Me." Manager: "Great! I've had a football agent on, two of those Domino's workers were actually Sunderland football players. He says we have to pay them image rights!" Employee: "Shit! How much?" Manager: "He says 35p for each player everytime we use the image or we can buy an unlimited bundle for them both for £4.99!" Employee: "What are you going to do?" Manager: "I've got accounts to transfer him 70p."
  6. Apartheid? 🎶 Free-eeee! Anti-vac Knacka! 🎵
  7. If I was a dab hand at Photoshop or whatever I'd be superimposing leadbitter's head, (once I'd googled who he is, naturally), on a Naples mural of Maradona. But I'm not a dab hand at Photoshop so I won't.
  8. Who? I've vaguely heard of the name but he could walk past me in the street and I'd be no wiser. I'm guessing if a NUFC player walked past one of their MLF'S he'd either get abused or they'd try to strike up a conversation where the massive lads fan's* take on it would be the player greatly respects Sunderland and deep down knows their fans are better or something but can't say too much in case it upsets people drinking gravy or punching horses or something to that effect? *Sometimes writing it out and saying massive lads fan is funnier than the shortened abbreviation. Imagine if supporters elsewhere were aware of it? Proper wtf moment I'd assume?)
  9. Blaking noos: Number one son of late honourable father, Fuck Dat Shi, to buy league one team Sunderland, Wa Dis Shi expressing early buyers remorse. More as it forrows.
  10. Hoo Fuk He is just about every player they have.
  11. Sac Kim Noo, the Korean manager being heavily linked to the Wearside job.
  12. Win Wan Soon and his cousin, Sta-In-Doon.
  13. They've ran out of money so they'll give their current manager a pair of false glasses and a fake moustache from eBay for the new manager bounce next season.
  14. Purely a coincidence I'm sure but they've had a few similar coincidences in the past.
  15. I've never for second thought anyone would ever get an appropriate sentence for this unless they were already dead. These things only get looked at twenty to thirty years later after for a reason.
  16. Embarrassing behaviour from semi-celebrity pundit Alex Bruce. (Him, Stephen Warnock and Neil Mellor must have the same agent and I hope he gets a fucking good cut from those three as I still don't believe how they've had so much TV/radio work based on their careers).
  17. Chief executive of a club with a tight owner? Overpromoted and secretly dreading the moment the axe will inevitably fall? Need to get new players but scared to feel the wrath of your boss? Hopeless at getting new players 'over the line'? Then subscribe to TossItOff.com/boardroom For a small percentage of your salary we'll advise when to sit back, how to ignore that phone call and give you the details of friendly agents that'll gladly accept a small decrease in their clients new salary if you give them longer watertight contracts they couldn't possibly get elsewhere. Why panic getting a new player in when that new player is already there at your club just waiting to sign on the dotted line?! TossItOff.com/boardroom, taking the worry out of decisions so YOU don't have to.
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