catmag

The bairn is going yo see the Lego movie today with his dad. I'm actually a bit gutted..

Not this time. Tiger bread though..

Ham, Seabrook crisps and salad cream sarnies. Bamptastic

There you go, it's all over now til next year

Happy birthday Andrew And I thought I was just responsible for informing you all of clock changes! I'm blaming Ant

Desperate rather than sad I would imagine.

Thanks! I'll be spending it in bed

Roses are widely varied, Violets are fucking violet, Trees died for those shite cards And you'll get fat on those chocs.

16hrs?! minimum of 8 is what I was always taught, unless things have changed.

Fasting glucose? Is that not NBM from midnight?

I thought she was dead already

Born-again mebbes!

Don't know about a knicker-wetter but it's definitely the best looking of the 3.

Funnier than the arseholes doing neknominate though.

Drizzled in oil

No, just chopped up.

Chicken salad!

It wasn't me cos I was having my tea. And I've already filled it in because I'm a swot

Now Hannah Gadsby I do like..

Jeff Dunham is brilliant I've seen him live too. As for Nina Conti - her and her monkey are both shit.

Love Sarah Millican's stand-up but her TV show is woeful - too scripted and contrived. Plus her voice gets screechier throughout which just grates on me. Seen her live a couple of times and going to her current show in May - she's been class each time.

Jo Brand is more tolerable now than she used to be, as you say. And it's true that there are very few women who are as funny as the blokes at the minute. It's not a sexist statement, it's just a fact. Loved Victoria Wood when I was a teenager. Still know all the words to Let's Do It too..

This could have been the best post you've ever written But you missed out Miranda.