manc-mag

Aye, I think my membership is summat like £57 but I dunno for certain cos it's dd and theyve probably up'd it again recently. Fucking hate the gym tbh-the only way I can bring myself to pay for it is if I dont see it leaving my account at all. In fairness though, although I'm 15 stone at least 10 stone of that is in the guns.

Freudian tbh. Dave's right, this place is getting more depraved than a Young Conservative Countryside Alliance Conference in Brighton.

Aye, thorty the next time round. and still fifteen stone no doubt. Half my age. If I can keep that ratio up into my nineties I could give Renton a run* for his money. *waddle

nah, I dont really do birthdays (meaning my own). Happy to get sloshed celebrating other peoples but I'm too much of a moody shitehawk about getting a year older to celebrate my own. Next year isnt even getting a mention. I'm going in to a bupa hospital on September 7th and being sedated until September 9th. *Books agency shift for September 8th at the Alex in Cheadle* My kind of anaethetics nurse-make sure you bring the Guinness drip. Don't want too much blood in my alcohol system! Oh and happy borthday Steve!

nah, I dont really do birthdays (meaning my own). Happy to get sloshed celebrating other peoples but I'm too much of a moody shitehawk about getting a year older to celebrate my own. Next year isnt even getting a mention. I'm going in to a bupa hospital on September 7th and being sedated until September 9th.

*strops off* Divent worry-I was rather hoping not to be reminded of it actually. And you can forget about the next one completely, just for the record.

"Say what you see!"

By the way, what the fuck were you drinking?

It seems weird enough for 'straight' lads to want to have something resembling a penis rammed up their arse but it seems even odder that there would be so many lasses* who would want a strap on of their own to perform this very practice. Whats in it for the lasses then? Do they get a kick out of rogering a blokes anus? Serious question. *I realise it's an Ann Summers party so is not completely representative of the female population.

Forgive me if I'm wrong, but I'm pretty sure John Wayne's hairy saddle bags doesnt refer to the minge, quim, punani, wizaeds sleeve, beef curtains, bacon sandwich, miiiiiiiiiiiinge, beaver, fanny, mott, fadge, clown's pocket, lady garden or the vagina in any way at all.

I resent that, you'd have to be a real arsehole to joke about something like this! Theres gonna be a punchline in a second I can sense it.....

Thank your stars youre not on Cath's ward. Get yersel' reet yer short arsed get!

Not blowing my own trumpet or owt, but my taste is fucking impeccable to be fair.

Not clicking on that......the girl's as rough as toast!

jesus wept.

See if you sacrifice on quality though you could end up with a bird with a hairy arse and a few too many tyres round her waist. She's high mantainance but she fucks like a demented rabbit so it's 6 and 2 3's tbh. She'd have to have myxomatosis to go anywhere near your cock I spose!

Bottle of bud? Diet coke? Surprised your wrists were strong enough to push the button in the first place tbh ffs!

You've got to love that scouse sense of humour tbh. The fucking Clampit!

It took you six pages to think of that? Must've found the 'fast reply' button tbh.

Jesus Wept. What a fucking carry on!

Bit depressed by all this-SMO's gone from Robin Asquith conquests in a hotel to pulling himself round a lift. Fallen on his (pork) sword tbh.

Glasgow Mag to re-appear too????

Who are ya? Who are ya? Bordersmag returns! Quality brassneck on this lad tbf.