Ayatollah Hermione

How have we got there then? Their slump has happened after they were knocked out of EL and we have key players like Simpson, Coloccini, Cabaye and Gutierrez who have played nearly every game. They'll never recover if that's the attitude in the dressing room; between us and Chelsea now.

He's always like that. His opinion is the gold standard in his realm.

I feel like I'm getting marked on a Philosophy essay/

I'm sure we've all ran into footballers, toon or otherwise, who have been either lovely or a right pack of bastards. When I was a bairn, I got my hair ruffled by Shaka Hislop when I was at the training ground. More recently, my pal saw Coloccini with a Primark bag but my favourite story is when Didier Domi had a kickabout with my cousin and his pals and they said he was shite. Got megged twice and fell on his arse trying to cross the ball. Not sure if he was letting them win or what but it hardly inspires confidence.

aka waiting for Liverpool to give him stupid money.

Ooh, I remember calling the wrong'un at school and the derby win in August but can't remember the other two. Not sure I make predictions often either.

I think I'll go down for a Brazil game like but it'll be to kickstart a day on the drink probably.

Half time lager going up in price.

As well, you could argue that he deserves it for status in the game alone and this being his home turf, warrants it here. I agree others deserve it for achievement but I'm still happy to see one of Sir Bob.

http://blackmarble.bandcamp.com/ These lads are promising. Obvious comparisons to Joy Division and other post-punk. Think Chez will like it.

Just give the ticket away. Their hospitality package will be complete horror, plus Sunderland/Bolton will be total shite. Watch the toon in a bar instead.

Fuck me, Di Maria giving Ribery a run for his money in the diving stakes.

How is Adrian Chiles even employed? I know for a fact, I'd be a better presenter and I'd just sit there swearing and calling Roy Keane a prick.

The Drowned World - J.G. Ballard. Canny, so far. Dystopian sci-fi and all that crack.

Albrighton looked canny when he first came into the side but he's went right off as well. I'd take none of them tbh, as Stevie says, a good manager would probably have them flirting around top half and that's as good as it gets with that group. They were terrible at SJP.

Not think they'll opt for a similar approach in the final? I think if they play Bayern, they'll certainly try and sneak a 1-0 in a similar fashion to tonight (thought Bayern won't commit quite as many men forward). I actually think we'll see a relaxed approach to the league game from them and they'll put their eggs in the CL basket. There's less variables if they turn up focused for the CL final, no matter the efforts of us and Spurs, they win that, they're back in it.

Regardless of what NUFC players line up against them, I'd still be supporting England in a tournament final. I still want to see them do well and win things, it just becomes increasingly harder to because of the squad and the fact it's basically another London team as far as we're concerned. I'd still love to see us win the Euros and will support us until we go out, despite the fact we could line up with rapists, thugs, racists and petulant spoit man children in our first XI

The squad is fairly deep in the midfield but Best and (up until this year tbf) Shola spend a decent amount of time out injured. There's definite shortages at FB and we could do with some speciality cover rather than the likes of Perch and Ryan Taylor, who have performed admirably there but are more use in the midfield IMO.

Just our pissing luck that. If we finish 4th at the season's end, it's going to be an absolute nightmare watching that final.

Another player Shola can say he's a better penalty taker than.

I'm sure he's the 16th highest paid manager in Europe. It's amazing that's where they went after Martinez knocked them back; they'd have been better off trying for Hughton, funnily enough (though not sure if there was any crossover between the two appointments).

Nice one. I was concerned it would start to drag but I'll give it a bash.

Hard to believe McPish will be there past Christmas next year if this current form goes on. Bound to lose N'Zogbia in the summer and his signings this year have been far from inspired.

There was that one time where that Liverpool fan came over, asked us questions politely, we answered in turn and then we discovered he'd edited his responses to make us look like a bunch of dipshits so he got it. Billy Castell, Andy and FCUM are/were all good crack.

Aye, I remember when we went down that you, I and a few others made that same point about us leaving the gravy train at that very point and I knew it would mean an influx of players who were at least motivated by football rather than one big contract from a bunch of mugs. However, I always assumed this would mean promotion and mid-table consolidation, never in my wildest dreams did I think we'd have this scouting system in place with these sorts of players.