Kitman

Kevin - my top poker tip: When the bailiffs come round, make sure they don't take your parents' stuff.

I think we all want the club to moving in the right direction. I don't think the optimists are necessarily being contrary, I think they're just desperate for signs of progression and will hone in on any positive noises or scenarios to that effect, sometimes to a ridiculous extent. Whereas I sit in my cynical bunker waiting expectantly for the club to plant its boot into my knackers. Harumph.

I wouldn't expect wholesale changes from here on in. Some won't want to move, especially if this involves dropping down a division or dropping wages, and some won't be sought after, and other clubs won't pay much if they perceive a player isn't in demand or PL standard. Plus some of these like Lovenkrands and Guthrie might still be wanted to pad out the already thin squad, and it might be difficult to get anybody in to replace them for a decent price as the window goes on.

Laughing at your own jokes, Kevin?

I'd be pretty depressed if Best was anything but a seldom seen benchwarmer this season. Depressed and bewildered in fact.

I think Mr Smith should forward correspondence from his "lawyers" to prove that he's not full of shit

Hopefully Ashley will be gone by the time he breaks into the first team. Otherwise he'll be sold to pay our water bill for the next 3 years.

It might not happen if you drove instead of posting on your iPhone

Also, I'm not sure who demands our players receive £80k a week. Unless it was a reference to the erstwhile views of the labotomised hemisphere he still keeps in a jar. I remember someone saying Enrique, Carroll or someone should have been offered 80,000 a week. I can't remember who it was. You can think I'm lying if you want, but I know I'm not. I also remember someone on another forum saying that Michael Owen should be offered whatever he wanted in January 2009 (ridiculous, I know).

I can't recall anybody who's agreed with nicks crackpot theory re wages. The only time wages tend to draw comment on here is when a player is a waster.

He's currently based in France I thought only his frumpy girlfriend and code were? No he's staying in Amboise

Because your crack really is rotten?

That we'll spend about £12-13m on a new striker and someone else. Obviously more if Enrique goes. Either way I'll judge them when we kick off against Arsenal and then again on the first of September. He He He realistic my arse, fucking totally over optimistic bonny lad. Since Parsnip has already "Marked our cards" that the £35M has been spent on Pies for the FCB, a new shop and some grass seed for the training ground; do you really think that FCB is going to ante up £12M, like fuck he will. I truly hope you are right but think you will be well disappointed come 1st September. Benni McCarthy is available on a free.....

He's currently based in France

Going on the last couple of seasons having a thin squad and gambling on escaping injuries and suspensions is probably a given.

The Eileen Drewery episode and the disabled thing was very damaging and lingers in the memory in a David Icke kind of way. Probably difficult to get a top job in football administration after that. Surprised he hasn't got back into management in the last few years though.

End of thread, I guess

The cynicism is inversely proportional to transfer activity. I'll shut the fuck up if some of that 35 mill gets spent (not including agents fees, signing on fees, future wages, heating bills etc).

I have to call you on this one. Believing the stories put out by the club and manager takes a substantial amount of credulity, in fact more than people realise, and therefore it's necessary to put aside substantial amounts of gullibility at this time to buy the club's future bullshit about transfers.

Don't forget free transfers aren't really free. They're as expensive as actual transfers apparently. When you add in the cost of tea bags and cones at the training ground, it's a miracle we've any of the 35m left at all. * cue evil laughter *

so you are saying he has a choice, pay bonuses out of cash and reduce the companies profit, or pay higher bonuses through a share scheme and make the company money and the members get better bonuses that makes him a cunt? Hmmm. To be fair he's not doing anything different to lots of other employers. It was nick bigging him up to be santy Claus

He doesn't speak the linguine obviously

As somebody who's not from Newcastle but has been there plenty of times, I can say Rhys thats a load of shite. I can't compare it with Sunderland however, I was advised a long time ago not to bother, never had a reason to go and I've never been. Looking at the pictures I can't say I've missed out. I've met a few people from Sunderland and they've generally been all right.