Dazzler

I mean, let’s see the dad first before we judge too harshly. He might be a dish.

Hawk Tuah struck me as a staunch trumper tbh.

Joe Cole’s allegedly.

I think it's the total fee relating to the transfer so would include bonuses, and instalments.

He's 5 foot 11 inches. Those are two measurements.

It's a loan by the sound of things so we won't be getting much of anything tbh.

I mean giving Ashby a squad number too doesn't seem normal when you already have Trips, Tino and Krafth so all the circumstantial evidence points towards us agreeing his time is up here, aye. At least we had him on the bench, and he was still doing his usual leadership patter and what not so we haven't fucked him over like Chelsea have done with a load of their players.

I think Shibby is going to be fucking raging soon

That's a sure fire way to lose some fingers. Just ask any Jack Russell in the cat and dog shelter. Good luck typing your short people racism if you go around patting us stumpy fuckers on the head too often.

Don't you fucking dare mention 5 foot 7 in the same paragraph as Ryan Fraser again. I am a monster among men stood next to people like Ryan Fraser.

Sky are reporting he's been told he's not first choice anymore and he's wanting out because he wants to play. Fair play to him. He knows Dyche from Burnley and Everton are so fucking shit he'll look a million dollars in their line up (sort of like he did when he first signed for us).

He'll love it at Everton under the smack head Phil Mitchell. All corners, every cross, every throw in, all free kicks. Plus he doesn't have to be half as fit and will have plenty of time to get his fuck on in Stanley Park with random passers by.

This is exactly the point I was trying to get at. Surely the RW Downie was teasing us with last night is Madueke and a similar deal we got with Hall last season. He's the one that ticks all the boxes and makes the most sense from a PSR perspective.

And living in a better part of the country and playing for one of the best up and coming English coaches, in the top flight

Kulusevski would be another £80m minimum - plus having to deal with Levy.

In fairness, that's exactly what Palace are expecting us to do with Guehi, and what we had to do with Livramento too. Even still that only takes the transfer up to a maximum of circa £20m (which is far too much - Jarrod Bowen he is not)

Nah, fuck Chelsea and their manager IMO. Sterling was absolutely shafted here and in hindsight absolutely correct to take them to task over it. Their behaviour after the fact has somewhat proven his point if you ask me. I'd still probably not take him unless it was on loan with no obligation like. I am not convinced he'd cover the same yards as Murphy and Miggy in defensive duties, but he'd offer a hell of a lot more going forward.

£15m + performance related add ons according to sky. So £15m. Spurs get £6m of that

Imagine going to work and your Poch protective father like type manager leaves and is replaced with this absolute psychopath man. Absolute shambles. Is Madueke training away too, is he going cheap?

FYP

It's off the back of Brighton selling a couple of players for mega bucks. He'd have been fucking shite according to the same mongs had he signed for Everton

Are people still crying about that left back we rinsed Everton for too? Back in the day he was the second coming of Maldini according to twatter experts and I don't think he's kicked a ball for them. Edit - He plays for Plymouth now

Fuck me, that was quicker than I expected

Who the fuck are they talking to? And where? How frequently? Do I need to bring my car keys?