Monkeys Fist

I’m not ashamed to say that I have.

Boooo!

She will be when she wakes up tomorrow, in her Tena Ladys and “I ❤️Boris” nightie, on the kitchen floor, reeking of gin and piss.

I wish I was that poor

Imagine if NHS workers got together every Friday during the lockdown for well-deserved piss-up. You’d have to assume Johnson would be fine with it.

This is the bit everyone finds hardest to believe.

Full of fine, upstanding members?

Guaranteed this is one conspiracy that middle-aged Tarzan* of theirs won’t swallow. *this divot

Fishing without a license.

Explains their fertile imaginations.

APYP

Does that mean we get the £200,000 back then?

I don’t know if you’re lying or telling the truth. I’ll follow my team and say “ Truth!”

Do you want to be RIDICULED?????

Riyadh Rovers rolls off the tongue quite nicely, if you ask me like.

I heard he fidgets constantly and eats loudly with his mouth open. No Thank You.

Because he can’t conceive the idea he’s actually wrong, so this is all just a matter of ticking some boxes. I think he might be in for a shock.

Ooh, Harriet coming in with the kick to the Dumbartons just now.

Bernard Jenkins having his turn at eviscerating the floundering skin bag.

CT- the new Mugwriter.

Not so easy to understand though