Monkeys Fist

“Germplasm”, whatever the fuck that is, sounds like a very niche porn category.

Guess who we’ll be getting after Bruce ? ( Hi Lee, how’s Mike?)

“ Wee “

“Me naime iz Le Ryda”

When it’s raining shit, you miss the odd nugget.

Speaking of Star Wars, do you know the average internal temperature of a Tauntaun?

Precisely Fish. I can totally understand why Peter Cushing was resurrected in Rogue One, it fitted in with the story and he’d played the character whilst he was alive. This James Dean bollocks is just bizarre- how did they come to the decision that James Dean, the bloke who’s been dead for 60+ years, was the best actor for this role?

Lolz Laters.

Noelie Gadd.

No no - Paris is for Champagne Enemas. Moscow is for hooker’s piss.

“ Stevie, there’s two puffs ower here mate” ” Never mind them, my little Irish bigot mate, have you seen this little cockney ower here? Where’s me phone, my twitter audience needs to know about this!” edit; his Twitter has been suspended there’s a shock.

He just wants someone to read it for him- it’s got big words, the biggest, and he’s too busy watching Fox News and sucking Russian cocks.

Crowd- mutters “ Little hipster shithouse”.

I wish someone had told the rancid cunts in charge over the last decade this, as they’ve been systematically rinsing the country for their personal gain.

This is a bit weird- Plans to cast a CGI James Dean in a role in a Vietnam War movie. https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-50330537 That’s fucked up, and very different from recent examples ( Rogue One, Gladiator) I’d say.

He should quote from the poem he published when he was editor of the Spectator. “ The Scotch – what a verminous race! Canny, pushy, chippy, they’re all over the place, Battening off us with false bonhomie, Polluting our stock, undermining our economy. Down with sandy hair and knobbly knees! Suppress the tartan dwarves and the Wee Frees! Ban the kilt, the skean-dhu and the sporran As provocatively, offensively foreign! It’s time Hadrian’s Wall was refortified To pen them in a ghetto on the other side. I would go further. The nation Deserves not merely isolation But comprehensive extermination. We must not flinch from a solution.” He’ll make some new friends.

Can you imagine the crack if Walter and CT had a bong together? “ Dave was a brilliant PM…” ” I see Tim Krul, the coward, turned his back on a shot” ”I once shit myself at Boldon Dogs” “ We’re both SMB’s aren’t we?” ” Duuuuuude!”

Unlike Cyril Smith…

I was about to say she might find the sudden noise when we score a bit overwhelming at her age, but then realised, you’ll probably have nowt to worry about. I’d expect the cunts will make you buy her own seat, but I can’t find anything to confirm that. Give the box office a tinkle.

I’ve just had a peep at his wiki, guess how old he is?

Lets all guess how many starter homes have been built under the Tories- A-100% of the target B- 50% of the target C- None

I really like his programmes- he’s one of the most honest documentary makers.The last one there about Mexico was superb. His shows aren’t about him, unlike Theroux, for example. When the heavies stopped them filming, he didn’t try to sensationalise it, it was simply “time to GTFO”.

Who hasn’t?