Monkeys Fist

As is tradizione, La Bella with quality festive stylings.

A blind mate of mine was offered a job - 2 days a week, 10am-2pm, office based. data inputting. £100,000pa and company car. He turned it down. I asked him him why and he said he just couldn’t see himself doing it.

Have you become a Sweaty?

The Big 3 unwritten rules of life... 1. 2. 3.

Im going to tell my Star Wars loving son this, until he goes insane.

I’ve been a bit down lately, and mate said , ” Cheer up man, it could be worse, you could be stuck in a water-filled hole in the ground”. I know he means well.

Been reading a Stephen Hawking book about anti-gravity. Didn’t have great expectations for it, but I can’t put it down.

Me and a mate were comparing the worst jobs we’d done. I told about the time I worked 12hr shifts for Dunlop, tearing the bottoms off faulty tennis shoes to recycle the rubber. It was sole destroying.

Mexican lad I worked with had prosthetic feet. Called him Roberto. He had a nice Audi through Motability, until some swine nicked it, which was when I learnt his full name. Roberto Carlos. I’m here all day…

Left West Brom earlier this year, I think. I dont don’t really care, tbh.

My mate tried to flog me his 52” HD telly, al the bells and whistles, but the volume is stuck on 20. £50 I couldn’t turn it down.

Looking at available candidates…

Mrs. F. would’ve been 17-18 at the time, in Forest Hall, (and I hadn’t met her) so had no say in the matter. I was busy slutting my way my way round Europe, Switzerland was chalet-girl time. Fugazi was was one of the choices I’d bang on when I was riding my plank in the snow Hand on the Torch by US3 was another.

What’s that I smell? It’s like Ham, only posherer

Can’t speak for Wykiki, but a nice bit of Fugazi used to gently ease me in to my morning ride.

Wanks on planks was our Nom de shred. Also, get on the Port and Brandies.

To everyone that’s had a birthday this year , happy birthday!

He’s this board’s Darren Anderton.

Thank goodness for that victory. I’m a bisexual ostrich.

Oh, I fucking hope so.

They’re a pack of almighty cunts. Murica at its worst

He’s a duck pizza lover, not a fighter, Michael.

He’s so happy, if he was a particular type of songbird, he’d be having bum fun. Clear as daylight

The irony of Butter Bean calling out someone for not having independently verified stats.