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Anyone had one?

 

I have to go for one on Monday morning and today had a half hour chat with the nursey wife about it.

 

While telling me she decided to try and put my mind at rest by saying "you hardly notice it, the camera we use is about the width of my pen" to which I realised she was using the biggest fucking pen Ive ever seen in my life, it was like one of those 6 colour ones you used to buy for the first day of new school year. :lol:

 

 

Whats it like? cos Im shitting meself :rolleyes: (which is a good thing really seeing as I have to give myself an enema an hour before I go) oh ajnd they ran out of envelopes so I had to wander out into reception with a box in me hand marked in big fook-off letters "Acme Self enema kit!"

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Whenever I've had a colonoscopy instead of an enema they have given me harsh laxatives to clean everything out. I think I'd prefer the enema to be honest because each time I've had the Picolax I find the day before I spend so much time shitting my arsehole is burning, and that's before anything has been inserted. On the day of the test though I've been heavily sedated and I can't remember anything about what was done and I must say I'm glad. It's not the fact that I've had a camera shoved up my arse that concerns me, but before they start there at least four people standing around, and they're all going to see my red raw arsehole from the laxatives and probably my balls too.

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Aye, I think they'll sedate you which will probably help. It's funny, before they sedate you they tell you a list of things you can't do for 24 hours; don't drive, don't operate heavy machinery etc...but the one I like is 'don't sign any legal binding contracts.'

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Aye, I think they'll sedate you which will probably help. It's funny, before they sedate you they tell you a list of things you can't do for 24 hours; don't drive, don't operate heavy machinery etc...but the one I like is 'don't sign any legal binding contracts.'

 

.... don't go out for a 'drink' with Gemmill'.... :lol:

 

Fuck me, is there anyone on this board other than me who hasn't had one of these things shoved up their arse?

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Aye, I think they'll sedate you which will probably help. It's funny, before they sedate you they tell you a list of things you can't do for 24 hours; don't drive, don't operate heavy machinery etc...but the one I like is 'don't sign any legal binding contracts.'

 

.... don't go out for a 'drink' with Gemmill'.... :lol:

 

Fuck me, is there anyone on this board other than me who hasn't had one of these things shoved up their arse?

I haven't either. Something to look forward to though, eh? :rolleyes:

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Aye, I think they'll sedate you which will probably help. It's funny, before they sedate you they tell you a list of things you can't do for 24 hours; don't drive, don't operate heavy machinery etc...but the one I like is 'don't sign any legal binding contracts.'

 

.... don't go out for a 'drink' with Gemmill'.... :lol:

 

Fuck me, is there anyone on this board other than me who hasn't had one of these things shoved up their arse?

I haven't either. Something to look forward to though, eh? :rolleyes:

 

So it is mandatory. :rolleyes:

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Aye, I think they'll sedate you which will probably help. It's funny, before they sedate you they tell you a list of things you can't do for 24 hours; don't drive, don't operate heavy machinery etc...but the one I like is 'don't sign any legal binding contracts.'

 

.... don't go out for a 'drink' with Gemmill'.... :lol:

 

Fuck me, is there anyone on this board other than me who hasn't had one of these things shoved up their arse?

I haven't either. Something to look forward to though, eh? :rolleyes:

 

Me neither. My arse has a 'NO ENTRY' sign on it and it clamps up the tightest of tight at the mere thought of some foreign object going anywhere near it.

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Aye, I think they'll sedate you which will probably help. It's funny, before they sedate you they tell you a list of things you can't do for 24 hours; don't drive, don't operate heavy machinery etc...but the one I like is 'don't sign any legal binding contracts.'

 

.... don't go out for a 'drink' with Gemmill'.... :lol:

 

Fuck me, is there anyone on this board other than me who hasn't had one of these things shoved up their arse?

I haven't either. Something to look forward to though, eh? :rolleyes:

 

Me neither. My arse has a 'NO ENTRY' sign on it and it clamps up the tightest of tight at the mere thought of some foreign object going anywhere near it.

I was talking to a lass about tattoos once and the current fad for getting them at the base of your back (for lasses anyway). She reckoned 'Access Denied' would be a good one to get :rolleyes:

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Nor me. Watched plenty though and if you've had sedation it's muchh better as you tend to not remember a thing. The gastroscopies are worse cos you have to try and swallow a hosepipe. It makes me gag just watching it :lol:

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