trophyshy 9002 Posted March 24, 2021 Share Posted March 24, 2021 46 minutes ago, Gemmill said: If we didn't have cats, I wanted a Border and/or a Lakeland terrier. We got a floof to try and avoid the cats getting chased by the dog. The jury is still out on whether that will be successful. You cats will move out if they don't like it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGingerQuiff 2412 Posted March 24, 2021 Share Posted March 24, 2021 I thought only middle aged single women owned cats Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 63051 Posted March 24, 2021 Share Posted March 24, 2021 I thought only middle aged men needed viagra. 👨🦽 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom 15528 Posted March 24, 2021 Share Posted March 24, 2021 Border Terriers are lovely dogs but they are fucking lunatics. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 63051 Posted March 24, 2021 Share Posted March 24, 2021 I must have the only dog in the world that doesn't like peanut butter. How the fuck am I gonna get him to lick my balls now?! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGingerQuiff 2412 Posted March 24, 2021 Share Posted March 24, 2021 Try washing them lol 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kevin Carr's Gloves 4936 Posted March 24, 2021 Share Posted March 24, 2021 1 hour ago, Gemmill said: I must have the only dog in the world that doesn't like peanut butter. How the fuck am I gonna get him to lick my balls now?! Marmite. Allegedley. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isegrim 11885 Posted March 25, 2021 Share Posted March 25, 2021 21 hours ago, Gemmill said: I thought only middle aged men needed viagra. 👨🦽 Them and chinese mice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 63051 Posted March 25, 2021 Share Posted March 25, 2021 This is behaviour unbecoming of a judge. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blastronaut 1476 Posted March 25, 2021 Share Posted March 25, 2021 21 hours ago, Gemmill said: I must have the only dog in the world that doesn't like peanut butter. How the fuck am I gonna get him to lick my balls now?! Gravy 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGingerQuiff 2412 Posted March 25, 2021 Share Posted March 25, 2021 Where did @adiosgo, the little smackhead Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 63051 Posted March 25, 2021 Share Posted March 25, 2021 1 hour ago, Blastronaut said: Gravy When the artist is called Howling Willie Cunt, the parental advisory seems unnecessary. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blastronaut 1476 Posted March 25, 2021 Share Posted March 25, 2021 Dunno like, Cunt seems relatively tame after a quick glance at the tracklist. He's fae South Shields. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catmag 653 Posted March 28, 2021 Share Posted March 28, 2021 Yo kiddiewinks. It’s just gone 3am but it feels like 2am. If you have any old-fashioned clocks in your households from the early days of the forum then please adjust them accordingly. And can you clear up those bottles and pizza boxes before I get home from work this morning. Cheers. love, Mam x 2 5 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 42128 Posted March 28, 2021 Share Posted March 28, 2021 16 hours ago, catmag said: Yo kiddiewinks. It’s just gone 3am but it feels like 2am. If you have any old-fashioned clocks in your households from the early days of the forum then please adjust them accordingly. And can you clear up those bottles and pizza boxes before I get home from work this morning. Cheers. love, Mam x 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 17996 Posted March 28, 2021 Share Posted March 28, 2021 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGingerQuiff 2412 Posted March 31, 2021 Share Posted March 31, 2021 That Amazon News account is about the worst PR I've ever encountered Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 50663 Posted April 7, 2021 Share Posted April 7, 2021 On 24/03/2021 at 10:35, Kitman said: Coco’s pops picking up coco’s poops So… having thought I’d dodged a bullet when Coco turned out to be stolen, according to her chip, we’ve now been “offered” her brother. By “offered”, I mean we’re picking the hairy little cunt up tomorrow for a “two week trial” i.e. until the little twat pops his stinking clogs. Obviously, it’s another fucking spaniel, the one , sole, breed I specifically said I wanted nowt to do with once I realised we were getting a mutt whether I liked it or not. This particular little shithouse is called Pip, so I’ll be Pip’s Pops picking up Pip’s Poops. Fuck right off I’ve decided that my only option now is to go full-on enthusiast and demand a second dog, but make sure it’s a Staffy, just so I can annoy Mrs. F. as much as this has annoyed me - the breed she specifically vetoed was Staffy’s, even though they’re superb family pets, short-haired, don’t shed, aren’t mental ( look up Rage Syndrome and Cockers!). Hopefully it’ll also terrorise this little Mackem shithouse FML MKII 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 50663 Posted April 7, 2021 Share Posted April 7, 2021 Just to add, the reason she gave for vetoing Staffys is that “they look too much like you”- meaning squat, stocky and punched-in, with minimal hair. And yet, here we are, getting a fucking mentally unstable, ginger fucking lunatic that likes chewing socks.… … I daren’t tell her what Spaniel’s Lugs is a euphemism for. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 63051 Posted April 7, 2021 Share Posted April 7, 2021 Mint. Photos tomorrow please. If it's any consolation, I'm warming to this little prick here. Tell your wife you want an XL Bully. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sammynb 4167 Posted April 7, 2021 Share Posted April 7, 2021 53 minutes ago, Monkeys Fist said: And yet, here we are, getting a fucking mentally unstable, ginger fucking lunatic that likes chewing socks.… So she doesn't want another version of you in the house but she's happy to have Gemmill! Staffys are lovely dogs problem is most staffy owners are aggressive, obnoxious cunts - well here anyway. A cairn, westie or if you want fuck off attitude a scottie will fit the bill plus the family will all be raging with jealousy once they see how much better the terrier is to the ginger loony. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PaddockLad 22456 Posted April 7, 2021 Share Posted April 7, 2021 The current Mrs PL has been ordered back to the office, thus scuppering plans to introduce a canine into the home 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 50663 Posted April 7, 2021 Share Posted April 7, 2021 46 minutes ago, sammynb said: Staffys are lovely dogs problem is most staffy owners are aggressive, obnoxious cunts Same over here mate, it’s a shame because Staffys really are such lovely little bastards- I’ll fight any cunt that says otherwise. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renton 27751 Posted April 8, 2021 Share Posted April 8, 2021 4 hours ago, Monkeys Fist said: So… having thought I’d dodged a bullet when Coco turned out to be stolen, according to her chip, we’ve now been “offered” her brother. By “offered”, I mean we’re picking the hairy little cunt up tomorrow for a “two week trial” i.e. until the little twat pops his stinking clogs. Obviously, it’s another fucking spaniel, the one , sole, breed I specifically said I wanted nowt to do with once I realised we were getting a mutt whether I liked it or not. This particular little shithouse is called Pip, so I’ll be Pip’s Pops picking up Pip’s Poops. Fuck right off I’ve decided that my only option now is to go full-on enthusiast and demand a second dog, but make sure it’s a Staffy, just so I can annoy Mrs. F. as much as this has annoyed me - the breed she specifically vetoed was Staffy’s, even though they’re superb family pets, short-haired, don’t shed, aren’t mental ( look up Rage Syndrome and Cockers!). Hopefully it’ll also terrorise this little Mackem shithouse FML MKII That's interesting. My daughter was petting an ex-neighbours dog, pretty sure it was a spaniel of some kind, solid black. It suddenly bit her on the face unprovoked. Claret everywhere, day spent in casualty, no permanent physical damage but the psychological effects have been terrible. This was 2 years ago, and she now has an increasingly worse phobia of dogs. Some seem to sense it and go for her, making the problem worse still. She now won't go anywhere where dogs are off the lead. Can't go for walks in parks or on the beach, bridle ways etc. As if lockdown wasn't bad enough we've suffered as a family because of this now as well. I understand why people love dogs but I'm no fan. Just wish there were more restrictions where they can be let off the lead. Needless to say, owners of aggressive dogs tend to be selfish twats too. They'd rather blame a scared little lass than control their dog. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 63051 Posted April 8, 2021 Share Posted April 8, 2021 Can you not take her somewhere to meet some chilled out canines. That is gonna be some fear to be carry through life seeing as dogs are everywhere these days. There's a cafe in town with little lap dogs where you pay a fiver to get in or something and you get a dog that comes and sits with you. They've got the same place with cats as well. Although they're both probably busto by now after all these lockdowns. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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