Howmanheyman

'Thats my boy' Hey, swings and roundabouts, one day you're wishing death on someone, next day you're telling folk 'Word up, Y'all need to chill yo asses' in a hybrid NE/Scottish brogue, (word to your mother).

If it was the club Comms you'd also see on there the die hard 'adopted Geordie' cheering Man U's last minute winner plus any Tom, Prick and Ho Chi Minh Harry who've ever gone slightly viral posting about NUFC in the last five minutes.

I feel like Bruce Willis in the sixth sense here, mind.

"Hello? Is that 1987? Could I order a copy of the Littlewoods catalogue, please? I, errr, I mean my wife wants to look at the lingerie section."

Klopp's ceiling getting bigger by the day whilst ours shrinks.

If he wants to go sell him to al hilal for £150m plus sell on fee, let him know he can fuck off from Saudi no questions asked when he gets bored after a year and we'll cash in again.

Maybe next time we hire a chief executive, aim for a bit higher than experience of looking after a yank football club?

Didn't he sing that 'thong' song?

Errrr, happy birthday I suppose?

@Monkeys Fist is Generation XXX, electric blue, Sven Adult bookshop, Westgate road next to the motorbike shop, sticky pages.

The nurse said to me 'did that hurt? It's not supposed to?' and I replied, (once I'd recovered my breath), 'scrape me back off the ceiling and I'll tell you."

If she puts it on YouTube don't forget to tell her to have a shocked look on her face in the title page plus maybe holding her head in her hands. (If she struggles to do the shocked face then tell her to pretend she's walked in the kitchen at one o'clock in the morning when you've got in from pub night and are devouring half the fridge with Wham on low in the background).

Just....

I'll be more than happy us getting him my point was I feel we haven't exactly sold at at high price for anybody since Fatman sold sissoko, Wijnaldum and Perez. (Obviously don't want Isak to join that list unless it's mega money and it's a non English side).

Yes he's a striker not a midfielder but how the fuck do our players go for only pisstake fees compared to everybody else? Longstaff, younger, loads of PL experience plus CL experience ten million, older striker, AWOL in the winter for the African cup, 'we're looking forty mill, guv'? ASM only £25m to Saudi and he was probably in our top three players when he went and only 25 or so?

Just hold a bag of frozen peas near it for half an hour and you'll out be playing five-a-side an hour later just like I wasn't.

🎶 Gem says, 'stay away fools!' 'cos he rules, and his knees are knacked. 🎵

I'm sure he was at the agency we kept on using around then, mondial sports or something? You had shepherd's son working with one and fobbing expensive has beens on us then Ashley comes in more or less did the same with a different mob.

I'm sure we bought him. Just checked, you're right. We just kept stacking up on midfielders that year and fuck the defence.

I'm sure he only left the books a couple of years ago? Fanks mike.

'God save the king' on a Union jack at Celtic on Saturday.

Supposedly mates with him but doesn't even know what club he was at?