Ayatollah Hermione

Babel who hit the post from less than a yard out and was immediately subbed Shocking outfit and absolutely nobody anywhere in that team contributed anything. Mitrovic spent all of his time whinging and starting fights with the keeper, Babel kept overhitting and underhitting passes and that Serri ffs. Looked like a luxury Anita who has been fooled into thinking he can try defence splitting passes. Get rid of them, sick of it.

And to top it off, you can probably get a microwave burger and a flat pint for a fiver

Fulham at the back Martial done about 3 of them with two touches

They want to call it “Dullverhampton”!

Pub should be called the Poobrick tbh

Albert Finished, more like

I certainly don't want to go all the way to Wolves to see that shitty fucking fireworks show they put on whenever they're on the telly. Faux atmosphere, Sky wanking piss artistry.

Good read, that and neatly sums up a lot of why I’ve fucked Twitter off. There’s absolutely no middle ground to any discussion anymore.

FWIW, I would probably subscribe to some kind of Premier League Archive if it had things like old games, documentaries and stuff like The Premier League Years on demand but apparently, they don't want to make money.

It’s because the Americans don’t understand anything about football

Liverpool getting all the decisions again, for a change

IPTV with a VPN for a fraction of the cost. For how easy it is and how intuitive the UIs are becoming, it's the future.

Comes here on the wind-up and ends up rattled. Lovely.

This season, I've heard 3 different people compare Emery to the butler from Mr. Deeds. After looking, it's very accurate but why have three separate people got such a specific reference to a movie from 2002 rattling around in their head?

The avatar

Ewerk confirmed as a wearer of brown slip-ons

Rugby is fucking poo

Dubravka's an excellent keeper but hard to defend that howler, really. Not sure if it was a slip in concentration after defending for so long but it undone all the defense's good work up until then. Very undeserved for Spurs, I'd say but that's how it goes sometimes. 4 points from Man City and Spurs would have been amazing but sadly, it wasn't to be. I thought Longstaff had another solid game once he got a few touches, Perez looked lively and a tad faster than usual; that's what competition does, I suppose. Would have been nice to see a bit more of Berroca but the circumstances weren't right. Still, bit of a kick in the teeth and could have been well avoided.

I was thinking that. Pretty shocking 20 minutes but we had worked some openings eventually. I can see these changing things around, wouldn’t surprise me to see Son go wide and cause some problems so hopefully we get through the first 15 minutes.

Spurs haven't drawn in the last 28 league games according to NUFC.com and this is hardly ever a draw down there so expect a 2-2

Creased that he's give it the big bollocks about having money and now everyone is demanding more for transfers

Might be the blind optimist in me but I reckon Muto has more than he’s shown too. Could be coming back off an Asian Cup win as well, providing Qatar’s extraordinary doping plan doesn’t prove too much.

Looks like exactly what we’ve been missing but I’m slightly concerned that there’s going to be an adapting period for him. Hopefully he just bursts everyone’s lips from the get-go but I really hope people don’t write him off if he’s not amazing right away

Diame has been decent as far as I'm concerned, he just needs Shelvey next to him to drop the ball off to. Similar dynamic to Cabaye/Tiote. We definitely need another body in midfield, though. As for Berahino, Pulis wants shot with shit for what he did to that kid.

Ashley is just getting his excuses in for the summer now. "Paying back that loan so Rondon isn't looking likely. Peter Crouch is on a free transfer though"