Ayatollah Hermione

Cacksaw Ridge, more like

Aye, I know promotion is the priority (and rightfully so) but that team could well get it's pants pulled down today. Very risky

Mitrovic is fit so wouldn't be surprised to see him. Gamez is also fit so wouldn't be surprised to see him go off knackered after 25 minutes

That Kirchoff looks like a canny player but his injury record is pretty shocking so I imagine that will put teams off. Cattermole is the kind of player who would stay and probably stand out in the Championship. The spine of their team has an average age of about 35 though so I imagine most will retire, leaving them with some very poor players indeed. Sometimes that can be the making of players though; look at what a season in the Championship did for the likes of Enrique, Carroll and Coloccini. I mean, they've got nobody that good in their side but some of the players that have come into a madhouse might settle down next season and start playing. Though, I hope not

Seen a tweet that seems to have summed up a lot of the upheaval in the last few months or so. Was along the lines of "Sometimes you wait decades for weeks to happen; sometimes decades happen in weeks" It does seem like something major has shifted in the last few weeks. And I've no doubt we're fucked. Me and Meenzer, hand in hand into the nuclear morning

Klopp's shiny happy yellow teeth clappy pashun is getting on my tits now so he can get beat every week as far as I'm concerned

At least this means the US have no ground to stand on when it next comes out that their soldiers have been lashing innocent Syrians in the knackers with bamboo to extract information

Does Allardyce still do his inverted wingers? If so, Brady would be on the right, Zaha on the left. I still have fond memories of James Milner cutting in and sending a ball looping out of play

We're years on and still getting glimpses into just how much of a heed-the-baal he was. Lovely stuff.

Tim Krul needs some coaching by someone that isn't a complete bull's knacker. Woodman Sr managed to drag every single keeper down to total incompetence whereas Simon Smith seems to be doing the opposite. Elliot improved last year, Darlow has come on giant strides this year and I'm sure (hoping) that Sels will eventually find his footing. Krul used to be quality, it doesn't just disappear.

11,476 with this one, jesus

Don't know what mine is. I'll check.

Wonder if CT still thinks that now the price of Super Noodles is slowly creeping up

Did Morgan release a book that bombed recently or something? Seems particularly starved for attention recently

I'd rather sign nobody than Barrow, he's fucking shit

I'm not sure who is coming off worse, there

JayJaySea Some of the stuff he used to come out with on here was absolutely class

Spoilers ffs

Well, he just has to wait until August and his first team can get beat in front of a big crowd at Newcastle instead

On a similar note https://twitter.com/ClickHole/status/822500337303060480

What a load of shit those WhoseScored previews are

Please nobody doubt my impeccable insight again. As it comes, I was impressed with the 3 young kids. Not so much in their general play but in the sense that they all wanted the ball and wanted to impress; it's clear Rafa planted the idea that this could be the start of a pathway into the first team. As for taking it, I'd say Findlay looked the most assured but agree that Hanley was excellent tonight. He kept Findlay in line while winning all of his headers, his duels and did nowt daft, even when you had some knackers complaining because he wasn't getting rid. Shelvey remains a class above this division and Ritchie's knack for finding good positions in the box remains intact. I thought it was comfortable, aside from the ten minutes or so when we let them come onto us but the subs of Hayden and Colback helped calm them down and we had plenty opportunities on the break in the last 10 minutes. I will say that, without Atsu or Yedlin, we're dangerously lacking in pace. I know Rafa is trying to get lads over the line but we could really use a rapid bastard off the bench in situations like this where, for instance, Gouffran was clearly exhausted (after putting in a canny shift, mind) and we could have done with someone getting in behind to get the third sooner. Anyway, good performance, nice to see the kids come in and show some raw promise and lovely to see that Shelvey hasn't missed a beat in his time off.

Racist. Though all the defenders are canny shit tbf

If there's truth to this, they just can't resist jumping in, can they? I've never seen self-sabotage on such a massive scale.

He's right, though. It's fucking tragic. The defending looks like a game of Cups on a park field.