acrossthepond

Financial predicament, namely that we're in the richest league in the world, sell out every home game, and spend fuck all on players?

They said they didn't want to play in occupied territory, it wasn't just a safety concern. That's what's sticking in the Israelis' craw as usual. This from a country where one of the biggest clubs in the capital has a "no Arabs" policy and regularly chants death threats to Muslims, including their own players.

Liverpool paid 75m for Van Dijk, let's start at that price before we even come to the table. But to be honest I wouldn't sell him at any price. Lascelles embodies the new NUFC under Benitez and he's only going to get better. A player like him is probably worth 10-12 points over the course of the season alone.

The "MLF" thing is meant to be ironic, right? Nobody refers to supporters of their clubs as "lads' fans" in seriousness...do they? Please reassure me.

Be kind to the lad, his dad died from being gunned down to death.

I'm going to hope that this is just the start of a personal odyssey for him. Injured in the CL final which Liverpool go on to lose, Salah makes a miraculous recovery in time for the world's greatest stage and leads Egypt to glory. By "glory" I would settle for making it out the group stage.

Do you think Ashley might sell to a non-league owner with ten quid in his pocket? We could have a rivalry with Accrington Stanley, it'd be brill.

He'll be hoyed out around the same time the Christmas trees are. Best of luck to him regardless. A squad full of overpaid pissheed cloggers, a shit tip of a town, a pair of blagging bullshit artists as owners, an abominable flatpack bungalow for a stadium. How's the rental market in Newcastle?

The sex toy twins at West Ham might actually be worse than Ashley. We finished 3 places higher than West Ham, their squad is littered with overpaid trash, their stadium is a gigantic mistake, and their fans are best left unmentioned. If Rafa wants to go he'll do much better than Tweedledum and Tweedledildo.

Cacapa getting the hook after 19 minutes or so in that game, iirc. Shola being offside from a free kick taken in our own half v. Derby. 1-0 Barton penalty game at Fulham - possibly the worst 90 minutes of football ever witnessed in the Premier League not involving Sunderland. Regular chants of "you don't know what you're doing" as a new formation was unveiled every game, with 2-3 players out of position every match.

Sad but brutally true. Neither Shelvey nor Lascelles will have been given a second thought. Instead some abominable set of cloggers like the aforementioned Livermore or indeed Alfie Mawson, Delph, Michael Keane, or Drinkwater will go.

Hayden isn't up to much. A replacement for him would be very welcome. Diame will probably start for another season, which I'd be happy with. Yedlin can't cross and his positioning is questionable, but he makes up for it with simply ludicrous pace. Keep him until that starts to go, we need it. Doesn't have to be a starter, but he's a good option to have on the books. I'd dispense with everyone we have out on loan, sign Dubravka, attempt to sign Kenedy, allow Haidara and Gamez's contracts to run out, sell one of Darlow and Elliott, shoot Joselu in the centre circle at SJP, and then start recruiting from there.

"I personally consider it derogatory." Cough up some money so Rafa can buy non-Championship players then and we'll not have a Championship team, you fat dickhead.

There was a special one for Isegrim too as I recall, and a few other wacky ones, including a Confederate flag and maybe even an apartheid South African flag.

Dorty bastard. Even I wouldn't stoop so low as to piss on Algerian footballers.

Can I start abusing Slimani again? He's been pretty poor in his brief appearance in our colours.

That's before even getting into how cock-eyed those grades are. Kirchoff at 8/10? The bloke's knees were swapped for lime flavoured wine gums about a year ago and he now spends his time warming Bolton's bench. Alvarez a 4/10? He cost them 10m years after he'd already left the club. Rodwell even earned a 2 for...what? Consistency in picking up his cheques?

When you look at that litany of absolute dogshit it boggles the mind. How many players have these chancers signed? The agents' fees alone must have nearly beggared them.

Moyes never had the stomach for it, you could see they were going down with him two games into the season. But the Greyson appointment is what really killed them off, as well as how long it took for Short to act. It's as if they never really clocked they were in relegation danger until after the January window despite being in it from the word go. The entire thing was a tragedy (and I mean in the Greek sense, not at all in the sad sense, because it's fucking hilarious ) in the way it played out, with everyone in the audience being able to see what was happening while the characters themselves on stage continue to plunge into utter oblivion, perfectly unaware of their fate.

Keane could've had 3 yellows this game. Can't fault the effort we put in but we were essentially playing against 12.

2nd yellow for Keane there.

You can see how unimpressed Perez is with the reffing. Every call is going to Everton.

Not yet.

10th place, 10 points clear. All this stems from the Man United win, if we'd not got that we'd still be down in the shit right now.

Days past it was us that regularly conceded goals that cringeworthy. Rafa has made us a professional outfit again.