acrossthepond

That's why we're staying up.

Two will guarantee it, one more combined with bad results for a few teams who are in the mix will see us effectively safe. We'll stop up with some distance, I think. I've thought that since beating Man U stopped the home form rot.

Of course that fruit loop would think Rafa is a bad manager.

Look how far Wales got as what was essentially a one-man team.

Just needs to make it 9 months and get to the WC that way. If he never scores another goal after that I'll not be bothered. Knowing our luck though some clogger from Stoke will snap him in half on the last day of the PL season and any hope Egypt had of success will be down the drain.

Ranking? I think Hodgson is the best of the lot but his time is nearly up, then Pulis, then the rest are much of a much. All of their careers are shot. Pulis on the other hand looks better in hindsight after the abomination that has been Pardew's time at WBA, so he's in good standing for another PL job - I think Moyes will end up in the Championship after his time at West Ham comes to an end, same with Hughes. Fat Sam continues to get PL jobs despite being a self-obsessed bullshit artist, so I expect him to resurface the next time an "established" PL club is starting to slip, perhaps Swansea after Carvalhal's luck starts to go sour around November next season.

We love a flair player, but he's more of a "don't care" player.

He blatantly never fancied playing for us, we had been dogging him for years and he bobbed from one French side to another until finally the $$$ won and we got him over here to prance about for six months and dirty his boots maybe four times a match. He was absolute dogshit in our colours and he can be as good as he wants anywhere else in the world, I wouldn't have him back.

The role of the opposition is to stand in fucking opposition. When May announces chemical weapons have been used by Russia, that's a real threat and the country does indeed have to stand united. But that doesn't mean we all have to hold hands and sing kumbaya like the Democrats did here after 9/11, and accede to everything the ruling party does in the interest of "national security", or whatever nonsense jargon is used in the UK political realm to justify misdeeds. What better moment could there be to ask about the Tories' connection to Russian political funding than right now - if you think the opposition should actually act as a watchdog for the public interest, rather than a lapdog for the party in power?

Southampton look finished the way we did two years ago under McClaren, and the way we never have this season. The belief's gone out of them. I don't think Lascelles and the rest ever really thought we would be in the relegation mix at the end of the season and it's showed in their attitude and performances. All down to Rafa. We'd be dead last without him.

Not bad. You can stay.

Now we're discussing the fucking gee-gees. Shoot me now.

Yesterday was two years since the 1-3 Bournemouth loss when I think it became clear we were going to be relegated again. This time around at the same time of year we're three places higher and much better off in terms of team spirit and application. I reckon it'll be close but we'll stop up without too much bother.

Perfect time for those manc wankers to pull their fingers out. Ta very much to the prawn sandwich lads, much appreciated. Milivojevic won't want to see that again.

BBC says Man U have not won any of the last 28 games they've been losing at half-time. Incredible stat if so and nothing could be more emblematic of their decline as a force in English football. When they were losing at halftime under Fergie you knew he'd kick fuck out of them in the dressing room and they'd go back out and win 3-1.

There are no words for what a busted flush Mourinho is. The amount of money he's spunked at Man U to have built such a pedestrian team is staggering. It worked to our advantage two weeks ago but now they're gifting points to critical relegation rivals. Those missed 2 points at Bournemouth seem mammoth now.

A 60-year-old woman, I reckon, judging by his thin skin and lack of periods.

Let's please try to hit the correct key when you incorporate another pointless ellipsis into your poorly thought-out sentence fragments. I know someone with fingers the size of Greggs sausage rolls probably struggles with the delicate touch needed to use modern technology (and your sister-mam only ever let you use the computer at Pennywell public library for 15 minutes at a time) but even someone with the rudimentary intelligence required to open a bottle of blue pop can tell the difference between a comma and a full stop. So get it right you cretin. And welcome to the board.

Twice, in the fifties.

Live long enough and I reckon we might all find out.

A consummate cockend.

Time for Brentabul or something equally moronic.

The Daily News has rag tendencies, but they are consistently and vehemently anti-gun. This is one of my favorite front pages ever: As true today as it was two years ago - more true, even. I'm a teacher and every so often I wonder if today's the day, and if it was, what would I do. Most likely get filled with bullets off a military-grade assault rifle wielded by an 18-year-old. It's a sobering thought.

Here's some goalkeeping stats from Sky Sports that show how relevant Dubravka may be to our survival (and how absolutely mediocre Elliott and Darlow have been): This statistical analysis reckons Darlow's weak keeping has cost us an additional ~4 goals this season. 4 goals prevented, in key games where it mattered most, and we'd probably be 6 points clear of relegation.

We could start an argument about whether Tino cost us the title, maybe?