David Kelly

Oh I have a heart of stone.

Still the greatest photo of all time

Is there a better sight than a mackem crying on the telly?

Very well. Jennings back in for India?

Me these days.

Fortunately (or maybe unfortunately for you) they aren't her doing anything too explicit. Just the usual type with her kit off. Someone sent them in a whatsapp group I'm in and I didn't delete them quickly enough so I now see them every time I close my eyes

Jesus fucking wept. They have no self awareness at all. They confidently predict they will get promotion at the first time of asking despite not having a clue who there manager will be, what players they'll have left and what money they will have to spend and nothing that has come out about the deal suggesting that they will have anything great pumped into the club financially. This after their previous owner thinking it was a better bet writing off circa £100m of debt than keeping them and trying to claw it back. Tbf the one thing they've got going for them now is that people are at last interested in them to an extent. They're like those pictures going round of Sonia from Eastenders. You know they're fucking awful but you can't look away.

What the fuck is this all about? Can't be true can it?

Well I did say just about. Really 7th and not getting in Europe is about as big an achievement as 10th and not in Europe anyway. Which was probably your point

Their 'mags are rattled' bit really is a strange one. We've just finished 10th in the premier league, something that is just about their greatest achievement in the the premier league era (well apart from six in a row ftm) whilst they have been relegated to the third tier of English football for the second time in my lifetime (somewhere we've never been). They are losing millions each month, have players on premier league wages who none of them even know where they are, don't have a manager and have just been bought by a bloke who has less money than those players on premier league wages and his Thatcher loving mate. What reason could any of us have for being rattled by their recent history? They only exist to be ridiculed or, if you're feeling unusually nice towards them, pitied.

Aye I finished it last night, proper loon.

Aye it keeps getting more and more strange.

Deadpool as actually pretty decent but not as good as the first one. If you liked the first one I can't see why you wouldn't like this, but it's not going to win you over if you didn't. Watched Chinatown again the other day too. Polanski might be a horrible nonce, but he made one hell of a film here.

I didn't bother with the second lot after the first six were so disappointing. I might check them out now though. I watched the first two episodes of Evil Genius last night. It's a Netflix documentary about the Pizza Bomber Heist (which completely bypassed me when it happened but apparently was big news). Really good so far.

Well surely anyone who wants to be involved with that lot fails fit and proper by any definition.

Surely if that's being done, it will have been done by the time the sale was agreed. Isn't all this time down to him getting shot of the non league club he owns and the league checking out him and his backers? Can the league say he can't have it on the basis that they don't have enough money to run a club of that size? Or can they only knock someone back because they'r a cunt?

West Ham announcing that they're going to make the appointment by Wednesday doesn't really fit with it being Rafa. I can't see how they could be so confident of sorting stuff out with him (if he was being truthful when he said he was only talking to us) let alone fatty by then.

Alan Thompson definitely went to Willington high school. He was a couple of years above me there. I can understand why Rafa would be so fucked off with Ashley that he wanted away but I would be a bit disappointed if he went to West Ham. Them two are as big a pair of clowns as Ashley is. The only difference is they promise the earth and deliver fuck all. Ashley doesn't bother promising anything. I think he'd be on to a losser if he went there but it just shows how much of a cunt Ashley is that we have to be worried about it at all. Mind you, I wouldn't be at all surprised if it's not just Rafa using West Ham as a bargaining tool with Ashley. Risky game if he is.

I'd have been tempted to give Butler the gloves and move Bairstow up to 4. Bairstow is probably second only to Root as the most reliable run getter we have at the moment so I want to see him in as early as possible. Also giving Buttler the gloves might make feel that he can contribute in more ways to the team so not feel like he has to go out and start hitting from ball one. No idea about this Bess kid but I'm glad we're giving a young lad a go in this series. Sticking with Moeen as a front line spinner has made no sense for a long time. It's got to be Stoneman's last chance. I'm a bit surprised they haven't given someone younger a go in this series. If Stoneman fails again they are going to have to try someone new against India. And unless Jennings can continue on from his last couple of knocks, or Hameed can find some form again, it's going to have to be someone completely new. And if Cook also struggles and decides to call it a day, we could be needing two new openers to come in.

I kind of agree but I think our money needs to spent on a 9, 10 & 11 as a priority so I'm happy to rely on what we have plus a replacement for Hayden for now.

Empire gave Deadpool 2 four stars. Considering their Marvel wankathon is still in full flow, it suggest it must be a right turd. I thought Game Night was ok but nothing special.

Totally agree.

I think that's right. But he's 31 in June so there's a concern that he will start fading with age.

That is a possible concern but I wouldn't be putting it at the top of the list. For me you keep him, Shelvey and Merino and replace Hayden (who I think is great person to have at the club, but unfortunately I don't think he's progressing). I don't think there's any real reason why we should expect him to fall away so quickly that it becomes a problem. He might not keep hitting the heights he has been since Christmas but I don't see his performances dropping off a cliff as long as he plays where he has been.

Yeah I that's what I was meaning about Cole. My problem with Perez is nothing to do with him being fancy. It's that he gives away possession too frequently. We don't have that much of it so we need to look after the ball better when we do. Of course he's been vital to us, we've not got anyone else who can play in his position.