sweetleftpeg

We're leaving work early today as it's going to be a right pain in the arse for people getting home. So I've change my mind, fair play to it, I'm getting a flyer off the back of it!

I've been going through a stage of watching films I haven't seen in years. Aliens and Clerks I watched last week.

'Now you know I don't like to talk about other people's players. Khalid Mohamed? Al Ali Utd have a triffic player there, triffic. But I don't like to talk about other teams players course..'

This is the problem I have with this whole torch bearers thing. My understand was that people who'd worked hard for their local community would be the torch bearers, but I've since seen sponsors, Drogba, Jedward, and Chris fucking Moyles getting to run with it. Piss poor.

They must have been to the Drs at some point surely. I saw one where this lass was going on about how she constantly had UTI's for the last 2 years..you can't tell me she hasn't been to see someone about that? I think a lot of these people are similar to a lad I used to work with. He'd go to the Drs with a cold and they'd tell him it was a cold and he'd come to work saying they were useless as he blatantly had cancer or something and they'd failed to diagnose it. It was just a cold by the way.

Paying for the Stags flight and accommodation seems a bit harsh like. I paid for my best man and his Mrs room at the hotel we were staying in on my wedding night as I felt that was only fair after all the help they'd given us. Did an upgrade on the sly as well, it was a nice surprise for them when they went to check in. Mind, I told him he could fuck off for room service being covered.

We have a jopint bank account but I always do the supermarket shop for a variety of reasons; 1) It's quicker. Much quicker. 2) I pass it on the way home. 3) We save what I call the 'Mrs SLP £20 bonus.' This is the amazing unexplained phenomenon that occurs when Mrs SLP goes supermarket shopping and it costs at least £20 more than my average trip there and shite we don't need/never eat appears in the house.

My Mrs asked me if her appendix scar made her look unattractive. 'Don't worry love' I said 'Your tits cover it.'

Must be a bit of a split with Celtic fans. If I was a Celtic fan there would be a part of me saying 'suffer in the 3rd division you bastards' then the sensible part which would say that Celtic and the SPL probably need Rangers to be there for money. What would we do if it was the mackems? On second thoughts, definitely the former then..

He seems to be well in at the beeb as an 'expert pundit' at the minute for some reason. All I will say is this; Best. Penalty. Ever.

Now Armageddon isn't the greatest films lets face it, but I've always liked the joke at the start where the bloke first spots the asteroid; 'I wanna name her Dottie after my wife. She's a vicious life-sucking bitch from which there is no escape.'

Whoever goes in has the added pressure of what to do with Gerrard. Personally, I think he's gone backwards massively and withe the money they have Liverpool could invest in someone in the middle who is much, much better...but that's a very brave decision to make and the backlash could be unbelievable.

That's a very cynical attitude, footballers and manager in it for the money. Actually, joking aside, I think he actually means what he says when he says he's taking 12 months off.

Funny how he got sacked after flying to the US to meet with them. I imagine he probably submitted his transfer targets which were a list of young English players he reckoned the club should wank £30m + each on.

Didn't get in the Euro 2012 team? Come on Roy, he hasn't played for Nigeria yet, he's still eligible.

Time for little Mickey to get his brochure out again. He might want to omit the last 4 years from it like..

Nah, he's said he's taking 12 months off. Although the press are still linking him with the Chelsea job, obviously the statement 'I am definitively taking at least 12 months off' was too cryptic for them to understand.

Good point, has he paid off the gambling debt yet?

Class Liverpool fan on the radio this morning saying they shouldn't of sacked Kenny for another 12 months because then 'Guardiola will be free.' Magic.

But he inherited a team who'd just been relegated, couldn't win games, and lacked not only a feel good factor but a feel ok factor. Look at how many PL relegated teams have died on their arse after relegation. Birmingham also had a transfer embargo, I think he's done a superb job in the circumstances.

Can't blame Hodgson for that squad to be honest, although I'm sure the press will. It's the middle of the park that worries me. Lampard is always shite for England. Gerrard looks like his powers have wained to a piss poor standard. Parker is a crab and Barrie is quite possibly the most overated player in the PL (I'll take pelters for saying that, but I stick by it.) Verdict: England to win it.

Good stuff, people will say 'good luck with the sleep' and 'wait till they start to teeth' but ignore that shite and enjoy it.

It's always everyone else's fault isn't it? 'Tevez started it..one of my teammates told me to kick him.' Fucking hell.

McLeish was a dead man walking the moment he entered Villa. Compounded by the fact Hughton was forced to get rid of a fair few of Big Ecks relegation squad and rebuild with no money yet Brum fans are far happier with the current side.

I can't understand people saying 'Man Utd were average.' So average that they only lost the title on goal difference. So are you saying Man City are average?