Monkeys Fist

This explains Fish's PM offering me discount ball gags.

Does broccoli have a similar effect on arse detritus as asparagus does on piss?

Broccoli soup and a Pastrami panini from the Settle Down cafe, ( as I listen to 6 Music). I really should be wearing skinny jeans and a twat beard :lol Edit: I'm not really doing this butty justice- it's pastrami, Serrano ham, dill pickle, jarlsberg and grain mustard. Sex on bread, in other words.

And now Mrs. F. is watching True Detective. Vince Vaughan's idea of menacing is to move only his eyes and eyebrows. It's fucking appalling.

Maybe, but I'll bet his grandad wasn't named after a sexy toffee.

Roast beef- brain food.

An ability to "mange du Fromage" in a simian fashion whilst avoiding/backing out of conflict?

Inside the Ku Klux Klan on C4. By turns hilarious and chilling.

Battle of Helms(Knuckle)Deep.

Nope, that architectural gem looks like this.

Be more specific- up the belly, over the Bald Wasteland and down the back, or just a quick Taste of Taint?

Spot on, Thomas, mutants included

"Thicket of winnets"

I take it Porridge McSporran didn't win then?

It reflects the need for the Chronicle's "Social Media and that Internet" specialist to justify their existence. ( it's probably Knight Ryder )

Is The Tinkerman sitting on a commode? Looks awkward.

They wish it looked that good. NSFW

Sitting next to CT watching Jackie Milburn- happy days

That is fucking horrendous. (Still would, mind)

Having acted like twat to the natives of England, he met a fitting end, rupturing his internal organs on a saddle pommel as he was, at age 59, taxi-driver shaped. So chubby, in fact, that they had to force his corpse in to the sarcophagus, causing the bowels to burst and spray corpse shit everywhere. Niiiiice http://penelope.uchicago.edu/~grout/encyclopaedia_romana/britannia/anglo-saxon/hastings/williamdeath.html Edit: didn't realise he was buried at Caen, I'll be there in August. I feel it only right and proper to visit his grave and loose a rancid, eggy chuff in tribute.

And can't spell fantasy.