Billy Castell

This is Man City though Fish, so I wouldn't rule out the Arab owners being arrested for being part of a terrorist plot to blow up Alton Towers 3 days before kick off, Tevez, Robinho and De Jong to be turned into root vegetables by Man Utd supporting aliens and all the Man City money turning out to be stolen from the factory that makes Monopoly. It is at Ewood, and to be honest, I can't see the Council House being intimidating like Mould Trafford used to be. It can be a bit empty in that ground like Ewood, and Hughes just isn't like that cunt Ferguson.

I saw that too. It was unintentional TV gold that 'report', pure Day Today.

You can see him thinking "Why the fuck am I here wearing this? Oh shit I'm going to have to pull the shirt over my head."

Put £1 on us doing them 1st game of the season. They may have 20 damned good strikers but the team may not have settled and the egos may spark off against each other. Our team may be average, but it is a team, and it is largely the same from last season and thus players know each other better. As for Hughes, his tapping up over Roque all last season and his lies to the media really put me off him. I may sound biased, but he seemed to be more dignified when he managed Wales and Rovers.

Which club have been bigger sell outs than Ben Elton with Bugger King? I think all those players are seriously embarassed to be wearing it.

Lazio to be sponsored by Elton John shocker. Mr. Motivator also hired as fitness coach. That Porno Boys kit a few posts ago looks like the Everton kit from the mid 80's when they were sponsored by NEC. Speaking of whom, one of the nods at work was wearing the new Everton kit today, and it was as shit as the pictures.

I know we're desperate for strikers, but I'd rather buy Leo Fortune-West than Smith! At least Leo will be cheap shit. I'm not too sure if this has legs in it, but if he does move to Ewood Park I think we will certtainly be programming Plymouth, Nottingham Forest etc. into the sat-nav.

I would suggest Shearer with Curbishley instead of Dowie. Dowie has done sod all since that spell at Palace a few years ago, and has a repuation for being a shit man-manager and using out dated training methods. At least Paul Ince has tied himself and his 4th rate coaching team to Franchise FC so there is no chance of him appearing.

Ask Shola Ameobi or Emile Heskey.

Phew, missed a big bullet with Zamora apparently going to Hull. He is almost as bad as Shola. I dread that it is only the Zamora end of the market that we can afford.

Sort of related story here. My friend at work from Newquay was talking about the skateboarding injuries he's had, and then mentioned something truely horrific. Apparently some kid was mucking about on the local skatepark on his BMX. He then fell off and got one of his bollocks mangled in the bike chain.

McLovin=Lovenkrands? That's who I thought of anyway.

Films: Brazil Life of Brian Blues Brothers City of God Das Boot So hard to limit it to 5. Re Toonraider: Suppose I should say 'prove it' at this point.

Isn't Sunderland's new stadium named after one in Portugal? A bit shit if it is, naming it after another team's stadium hoping their past glories rub off on them.

No other reason than to see this show than to see some live sex though. Or a madman decapitating Davina McCall.

Has there been any hardcore anal fucking or anything like that yet?

I think you'll be getting more sympathy from other team's fans when they realise just how shit your pre-season is going. It may take a while, but I don't think you're as unpopular as say, Leeds. I admit I may have joined in the smirking before I joined this board, but I just dispair for you guys now. I hope you can get a decent new owner soon, otherwise you may end up the next Bradford or Oldham at this rate. It just sucks to see any club so badly managed and in limbo for so long, whether it is Blackburn, Newcastle or whoever. I'm so glad that Rovers were not bought out by Ashley's former cronie Chris Ronnie. He seems to be the same kind of guy as Manboobs Mike.

I presume you have never seen Jason Roberts when 1-on-1 with a keeper. Or in front of an open goal We have a gentleman's agreement to take Di Santo on loan from Chelsea, but that has not been formally sorted out. As much as I enjyed watching Chris Samba up front, I hope he plays at the back where he belongs.

He's a right back/central defender isn't he? Not sure we will be in for him to be honest, as we have Emerton and now Jacobsen who can play there, as well as Keith Andrews if there is an outbreak of the plague. Our main focus is on getting a striker or two, then getting a decent midfielder.

At least you can see that show and think "my job may be shit, I may be a bit short on cash this monh, but at least I'm not one of those cunts." Always amazes me that there are a never ending pool of scum that are so willing to go on that show and be shouted at by Jeremy. For goodness sake, can you get a DNA test somewhere else? As for the lie detectors, well, the whole basis of the test is deeply flawed. For starters, you can give false results if you are schitzophrenic because you live in your own warped perception of reality, or a clinical psychopath as you do not feel any emotion and therefore can control yourself to the extent that you can give a complete fabrication and remain as cool as a cucumber. You can train yourself to beat the polygraph test if you have enough time. Lie detectors have been debunked, but as with with Freudian psychology, people seem to believe that it is proven.

Dyer's worse than Steven Reid, and that really is saying something. A lot of players have a reputation for this sort of behaviour, so it could be anyone if true. Either way the girl's a fucking mess if all you have to say is "I play for Wigan/Burnley/Spurs and she lets you enter through the tradesman's entrance. If these players are as bad as the tabloids make out, clubs should introduce monthly checks for STDs like they do for the Marines.

That episode always makes me smile. What the fuck was he playing at?

I remember him when he had knees he doesn't anymore Exactly. My reaction was 'does he still play?' I guess its because all other targets have been trumpted up with the cash the Mackems and Villa have, as well as those who recieve the pots of cash from Real Fascist or Man City. The likes of Bent for example who would normally cost £6-10m in a reasonable market are now touted as £12-16m, which we seriously cannot afford. Especially with wages taken into consideration. So we either have to sit and wait, buy a clapped out freebie or hope we get some 'Vladimir Sukanobov' from Dinamo Turnip who no-one has heard of.

Sad to hear, as he will always be my favourite ex-Rovers player, even including our mutual friend. I just hope the surgeon gets banned across the world, as such incompetence cannot be excused.

Wasn't it Taylor who blatantly handballed a shot off the line and then mimed that a sniper had shot him? I think it was against Villa a few seasons ago. Maybe that's why he's allegedly replacing Terry, as both are divers. I have to say, Taylor wouldn't be the 1st name I'd think of to replace 'honest' John.