Howmanheyman

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/godzilla-9-foot-great-white-shark-3658246?

Sold for £35.

How's this going so far?

'They don't think it's all over.'

"Now then, now then, young Jack, can you, possibly, tell me, what was the exact score in that derby match you just happened to play in?" "I can't hear you!!" "3-0, marra! FTM etc, etc."

He knows the fucking score, man! Play for the opposition in any derby where you're from that town and you're going to get jip. Like I said, he starts with that hanging over him so it's up to him to get on with it and get people onside.

"Happy birthday, young man."

Some words/things just work better in Geordie.

So are footballers who go on the likes of twitter posting pics of themselves using their fingers to count show the score of a game. Honestly, man, why are football supporters going to be over the moon to sign such a footballer who has taken the piss out of you? The kid has to win over the support with his actions on the pitch which isn't a problem to me as at least he has something to prove and will have to put it in.

I should've tried to go to his talk-in up here. Would love KK to ring one of these daft bastards on the likes of talksport when they try to play down the size/potential of our club.

@ the CT shrimp BBQ jokes.

Sitting in the bait room at work today I casually turned to one of the lads and asked him if he'd heard the one about the Nazi interrogation officer? He'd barely got the 'No' answer out when I slapped his face shouting 'LIAR!' in a loud German accent. (It was a gentle slap, promise).

Great and poignant piece in the Guardian. http://www.theguardian.com/society/2014/jun/04/coalition-attacks-nhs-return-britain-age-workhouse

I'm looking forward to another season where we really "attack the cups" (Alan Pardew).

Metro Radio breaking news: "Staff at Newcastle United's ticket office were today called in at 6.am to deal with season ticket sales frenzy after the announcement of imminent transfer of jack Colback from Sunderland and young Perez from Tenerife who was playing for the Thomas Cook reps team on the Canaries island."

Ok I'm in. I better not get someone daft like Iran or England! I'll put £2 in via the donate button.

"'Appy birfday my awhld Sahn!"

....And still collect more points than Keane.

Looking forward to Bendtner playing for us next season.

Helped the Missus put the shopping away and seen this in amongst the stuff........ ......She'll be be getting served her divorce papers first thing in the morning.

Got done a few years back for pinching some tampons and Sunglasses from her local Tesco. Said she was expecting some sunny periods later that week.

Jason and the Argonauts

Hail Caesar!