Ollie Burtons Grandad

Aye we have signed a right footed left back and a keeper that we did not need. Mind he cost buttons so I suppose it fits Ashley's style. Just need a decent striker. If you are looking at the numbers side of it, our squad has gone from a skeleton to a tramp in a threadbare coat. Still Santon is better than fuck all and I did not expect FCB to get anyone in at all. It still keeps the FCB in a hearty supply of pies with the interest off the transfer profits. Bastard.

Toon signs ace Striker "Pardew states new signing is fucking mint in the air and can add a spring to our attack" Mr Rusty the Manager of The Magic Roundabout XI said that he expected Dillon the Rabbit to fill the spot vacated by Joey Barton. Zeberdee has cost Newcastle 2 Mars Bars 12 tins of Stella and a couple of jazz mags

According to the Daily Mail its sorted. Not a bad bit of business to be honest, of course he is the cheapest of all the ones looked at!! Newcastle United have agreed a £5million deal for Inter Milan full-back Davide Santon. Manager Alan Pardew has turned to the 20-year-old Italy international after hitting a snag in negotiations over PSV Eindhoven defender Erik Pieters. Santon can play either side and has progressed through the ranks at Inter. Boost: Alan Pardew will be happy after agreeing a deal for Davide Santon Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/...l#ixzz1WNozdDks

And don't discount our £20M free signing Demba Ba, who thus far looks worth every penny. Well he has been so fucking poor so far he can only get better.

Aye Carlton Cole for 10 bob then we could have the same front two that did so well for West Ham last season....so well they went down.

I can only presume that you were pissed when you posted the above bollocks; either that or you are as deluded as CT. As we struggled to beat a poor 3rd Division Team can you explain why you think our threadbare squad could now take on and beat the likes of Chelsea, Manure, City and the bin dippers?

Aye well Ba is not the only one who has looked shite against a piss poor Team. So much for our strength in depth eh, cant even do fucking Scunthorpe.

LLAMBIAS A Total Arse

Aye well only a sad fat shitebag like Ashley would get rid of one of the best players we have to another Premiership side who will be in the bottom half with us. All for free and no replacement I bet. Trumps anything the Everton Chairman has done.

Your so right A draw with Arsenal and a win over the mackems in their back yard has really got me in the dumps. A win tomorrow in the cup, our best defensive start in over a hundred years possibly on Sunday........I might just begin to frown. You truly are a total fuckwit CT, we have a team without a proper left back or decent striker and have now lost a class midfielder to another Premiership team for fuck all and you post smug drivel like that. Wanker.

4 points is good, Fatty spending some of the £40M+ on a striker and a LB would be even better.

Steve Bruce seen after the match

Personally I dont give a fuck about the Bin Dipper B team (Everton), fucking hate Dalgliesh tho. Ashley is the worst Chairman in the history of Football imho, fat cockney bastard. http://www.is-a-cunt.org/search/label/MikeAshley

Its plainly fucking stupid having known since January we needed a striker and for eons that Enrique was going to be fucked off to the bin dippers; yet here we are 1 game into the season having to read shite from Pardew / Lambsarse that they know what we need and they will be making signings. Useless lying cunts . Making more fake headlines with there mates at the Chronicle morelike. What odds of Kuqi being resigned?

Inbred Mackem Bastards 1 - 2 Newcastle (Barton, Shola (pen) ) Bruce to whinge like fuck and then spunk another £5/6M on some old cunt from Manure 7 yellow cards and a Mackem to get sent off in the second half. Oh yes, Deadman will buy another pack of Rockstar from ASDA whilst Daddys cock willl get sodomised by his father/brother/per dog (again)

Is there actually a point in posting quotes from a discredited NUFC mouthpiece like the Chronicle, especially when the quotes relate to the king of Bullshitters Alan "Any lie will do " Pardew. Full of shite clichés and nonsense; "Full swing" what a cunt, he must think we are all as thick as CT.

Any chance his new contract, changing his pay and length of employment, would constitute a change in work or add to the time it takes for him to reapply in any way? You would think the club would just issue a statement clarifying the situation, but they're probably just too embarrassed by it all. All that should have been dealt with at the time by an application to the Home Office; of course seeing as our clubs administration is totally fucked up they may well of forgotten about it. A true bunch of cunts either way

Once a Work Permit is granted Tiote would have been able to obtain a Visa to enter the UK and at the arrival airport (Heathrow / Gatwick or wherever) he would have been given a stamp in his passport for the length of his Work Permit. However despite having that stamp he would still need a valid re entry visa to gain entry to the UK. That being the case:_ 1) Yes but whilst his Work Permit was valid his re entry visa must have been very close to expiry. 2) Yes he would have had a valid Visa to enter the USA but that was only valid to enter the USA not the UK 3) Whilst they were in the USA some bugger must have noticed that Tiote's re entry visa had expired and as such he could not return without a valid re entry visa 4) Because he needed to obtain a valid UK Visa, as there is no UK Embassy in Ivory Coast he went to Ghana to obtain a visa from the UK Embassy in Accra As for why a 2/3 day wait for a re entry visa has suddenly morphed into a 2/3 week wait fuck knows, being cynical 2/3 weeks is the time it takes to process a change of Work Permit; something which happens when you change employers.

Either them or Arsenal tbh. Just been talking to my mate at the British Embassy in Ghana and he said that they can process a simple visa renewal in 2/3 days: which makes one wonder exactly why Tiote's application is taking so fucking long. Thing is he also said that to process a Visa which includes a change in the actual Work Permit can take 2/3 weeks. The only reason that there would be a change in the Work Permit would of course be if the footballer was changing clubs. Odd that..........

Proven with him dishonouring his word in Nolan's contract talks. I believe Nolan too. The nearer we get to the start of the season the less am looking forward to it, the players are all fucked off by the sounds of it, morale must be wank regardless what noises are coming out of the club. Me uncle was talking to Beardsley in Morrisons of aal places yesterday and he said Peter said what a remarkable job Ashley had done in turning round the clubs finances?!?!?!?!?! He also said there'll be nee money to spend this summer, but reckons they'll have a go in the winter and next year. Disgusting how a hero of mine has let himself be bought off like this cos they gave him a job. the more I hear of Peter Beardsley, the more I think he's slimy little arse licking wankstain. Of course, what he did in front of the Kop just before signing for Liverpool told you everything about him, his actions since have only confirmed it beyond dispute. A great footballer, but as a human being...what a total cunt.

Are you off your fucking trolley or an eccentric genius? My vote goes with the trolley

My neighbours Parrot needs a new perch; now that a job the useless twat at SJP could do no bother. Unless the Parrot nutmegs him I suppose.

A Football Manager should get praise for how he manages; Pardew indeed put on a "performance" and that is because he is little more than Ashley's monkey on a string. How many lies does he have to tell for you to twig that he is a fucktarded puppet who has a shite CV as a Manager. The only thing he will pull off is Ashley's cock.

Is that the same Graham Carr who has scouted us fuck all so far? Aye another bastard at SJP who has earned his wages ffs. Lets guess what shite he said, Hmm how about Mike is a really good bloke but misunderstood; All going to plan with transfers; Good Squad , Morale sky high; Any other bollocks I have missed? Oh yes Alan's looking at a good start and an improvement on last season. Just saved you the cost of a subscription, oh sorry Ben Arfa "He will be like a new signing when he comes back"

Thing is, exactly which decent footballer would want to come to the circus that is NUFC when they will be looking at relegation and a total wankster of a Manager?