Alex

Speak to me, Goose

Going to Aberdeen for a Xmas party and not even staying overnight?

Remember going back about 25 years and the story emerged in Heaton about this bloke who was a paedophile. He was well known in the community, so to speak, and he was also a scout master. My cousin went to the same scouts group and, although he wasn't a victim, when it all came out he said him and pretty much everyone else there had known about rumours about this bloke for years. I just thought about it relation to this and how you have weird code of it being an open secret to some people but they don't feel like they can tell anyone outside that circle about it. My cousin's parents knew this bloke quite well. He was always at barbeques at Heaton Stannington FC in the summer time and stuff like that and they were understandably upset because they never suspected a thing (and their son never mentioned it). He was seemingly happily married with kids and all that sort of thing too. He got done and sent down for it.

Gutted. For a moment there I thought Louise Mensch had died

It was called Toontastic

And he doesn't like Rafa.

Have a good one, TK

Yep, it's on the button.

If he posted that yesterday, he hasn't been yet

Haven't got round to getting it yet.

Reminds me of the letters in the Telegraph or Mail complaining about the state of Britain then signed off by some retired Major living in Provence

It's a fucking German dog as well.

Yeah, it's been fantastic tv. Really looking forward to the final episode.

I hope it genuinely did offend them and piss them off like.

Surely any parodies of her would be redundant now

Saw a documentary about him once. Apparently he used to hustle people in the 70s in pubs in London with a claw hammer in his back pocket for protection. As you do. He's basically your archetypal old skool, white, working class cockerney wankah. Once saw him on an episode of Booze Britain He got into a 'discussion' with some bloke in a chippy after he'd been doing some guest appearance darts night in a boozer. He was told to go home quietly by the police and the last shot of him was him still arguing the toss whilst staggering down the street. You won't remember but he was a big celeb in the 80s.

Was never a massive fan of The Cure but I think they did some quality stuff. I really liked that remix compilation they did (Mixed Up). The version of A Forest on there was class.

Then claimed he would've donated the cash to charity

He was in the Mafia ffs

It bet it was like that bit on I'm Alan Partridge where he burps to get the attention of those two Irish TV executives

His average is much better at 5 than in any other position though. All his other stats are much better there too. I think he's a middle order batsman who should be at 4 or 5. 4 is his next best position statistically. I think moving him about has been brought about by necessity but he's our best batsman and, ideally, he would bat where he's most comfortable.

Interesting stats re: Root which I think illustrates where he's at his best. He's scored 11 centuries playing for England in tests and over half (6) have come at number 5. He also averages over 70 batting there. He's also scored much more runs there than in any other position and scored well over a third of his total runs there (1755 out of 4402). That's from 28 test innings (out of total of 94).

Duckett should get more chances batting in England but, following on from what has been said previously, it should be at something like no. 5. Cook, Hameed, Jennings, Root, Duckett, Stokes, Bairstow, Mooen... has the potential to be a fantastic test batting line-up. Ballance shouldn't get anywhere near the side though.