Ayatollah Hermione

Playmobil head Wykiki, did you watch Howe’s press conference where someone actually asked if Arteta should be considered for manager of the season? You should check it out if only to watch a bloke say “Not a chance” in the most diplomatic way possible

These arseholes know the potentials for clicks and ENGAGEMENT when they see it, mind

Kasper is a total bellend so no thanks. lots of talk about Ekitike again this morning. Possibly a loan deal with an obligation to get around the FFP. There’s so much smoke with that, you’ve got to think there’s a good chance.

The only thing that will take this shirt over the top is if we go unbeaten in it

We’ve been through this. The man simply cannot limit himself to 3 meals a day with the odd healthy snack. And every time you tell him to walk more, he pretends that you’re telling him to train for a triathlon.

I literally cannot believe this is still going on. A decade down the line

Wonder if he’ll be chipping in some cash

I’m no Eddie Howe but I do wonder why he doesn’t swap wings more often, especially when the opponents right hand side is usually set up to double or triple mark him

“Just wanted to take a hedge strimmer to my mates bare back in a social club full of children. I mean, isn’t that what my weekends are for?”

Arsenal If Spurs beat Burnley on Sunday, their bottle will truly go on Monday night. Another great performance as part of ARTETA’S PROJECT ™️

Villa is a dump and he had to be managed by Steven Gerrard. Here, he has Eddie Howe and his lovely smile telling him everything will be ok

Here me out, brother. Why not both? Let’s have a first and second XI that we’ll all be happy with

The ARTICLES and fume that will cause is very exciting

I was fairly adamant around Christmas when that thick cunt Clark was getting himself sent off against Norwich

He was looking like a bit of a beast for a time under Ancelotti tbf but how many games has he managed to string together? It’s Edwards so you’d be tempted to say it was bollocks but he was bang on with Wood when nobody else was. The article also mentions Ekitike is likely to sign as well

He won’t be wearing a skirt on the pitch, ye kna

So blessed are we to have the return of a fully grown man who feels the need to vomit out every possible thought, question or event, no matter how insignificant or uninteresting, at a breakneck pace

Will make getting Phillips easier too.

What a truly soulless parcel of shit. They should really embrace the kitsch of Americana and have an endless parade of teddy boys and flappers but no, they haven’t got a clue

Genuinely never expected Leeds to drop but then you see some of the shit they bought in the summer and you wonder how it wasn’t fairly obvious sooner

Is it?

Lingard is asking too much apparently so it would be very funny if we were to steal Coutinho

Some obscenely rich Saudi shell corporation on the front and Sven’s Adult Books on the sleeve.