Ayatollah Hermione

All of the bottom three getting cut adrift now and none of them seem like they've got a great escape in them. Now, we just have to cross our fingers that the mackems finish bottom of the heap.

tbf, I'm not sure he was ever going to do much over here, never really seemed suited for it but I suppose a more sensible set-up might have nurtured him properly. Not to mention he never really wanted to come over to England in the first place.

£15 million for Kenedy, a player who has settled in immediately and can only improve, seems like an absolute no-brainer so I'm looking forward to how we fuck it all up.

Rowett seems to have a bit about him. Was sacked pretty undeservedly at Birmingham and is having a canny season at Derby. Mind, so did McClaren. Eddie Howe is doing a pretty fantastic job considering Dan Gosling routinely starts for them.

They tried again today Here, someone take me to Durham so I can pick the fucker up and proceed to lace every single employee.

Another victim of Rafa's merciless mags.

Neville has history of defending spitting tbf when Evans and Cisse acted like idiots with each other that time. A bit of racism as well when it seemed like he was implying that all Senegalese lads use hockling as part of their voodoo mambo and Evans was just an innocent bystander.

Hard to think of any players that actively improved under him at any club either. Well, James Perch went from being a waste of space to being halfway useful but not sure how much of that was Pardew and how much of it was not being stood next to Sol Campbell.

Consider it done. Got another Saturday delivery sorted due to my incredible strength and charisma.

Don’t drive which also makes getting to the depot to pick up a drum kit a right fuck on. Aye but it only updated this morning with “the customer was not there” but the estimated delivery time still says “10th of March before 18:00” Basically, another useless tracking service tbh

Aye, they’re usually good but the place I got the kit from must use TNT so I’m stuck with them for this. What’s worse is that TNT also deliver to where I work so I’d bet my kit was in the van that pulled in this morning

Harlem Globetrotters will do a couple of shows in Pyongyang

Another day, another fuck on with couriers. Got a new electronic drum kit bought and paid a tenner for Saturday delivery since it was the only day I knew I’d be in to accept it. Turns out it got lost or some fuck up happened and it didn’t get delivered. Turns out they tried to deliver it today and obviously nobody was in. I’ll ring them when I get in but has anyone had experience with TNT specifically? I’m not paying for another Saturday delivery and I’m expecting reimbursed for the last one tbh, especially considering the tracking on the app still says it’s getting delivered on the 10th of March. They going to be arsey and not let me pick a specific time, meaning I need to dish out some millimetre treads or are they alright? Keeping in mind, this is a 450 quid piece of kit and not a pair of shoes from ASOS.

Did he?

Is that not the turbo virgin who wrote that song about us going down?

If any buyers want a big empty stadium, Sunderland will be cheaper tbf.

Loved seeing Mark Noble trying to hoist that kid off the pitch by his kegs. In Noble's mind, he was probably pushing immigrants into the channel, all in the name of Brexit.

Lovely stuff. Those two boilers, man. One has teeth like a pan of burnt chips and the other one is very fetching in her club coat/tie combo.

Good result but there's no way that we'll play a side as bad as them again this season. They were shambolic but, being fair to us, we picked them off which is something we hardly ever do.

They should have learned from us and Siem De Jong when it came to Klaassen. Never sign Ajax's captains.

Glad to see Rashford playing well and scoring again, even if he was being a bit daft with his tackles. Or some might say....RASH

Reckon that video of them mouthing off last season about us being in The Championship should be posted in this thread once a month.

He gets the bunting out so he can sit teary-eyed any time there's any kind of Royal event, man. He's completely in awe of anyone with unearned status or wealth because he's a fucking pleb.

Poor Graing. Sticks his head above the parapet for five minutes and gets a face full of elephant shit from this lunatic.