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Monkeys Fist

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Everything posted by Monkeys Fist

  1. Mackems taking our cast-offs once again. You’d think they’d learn it never works out well for them…
  2. You sure it’s not Cornuto? “Rodeo” would be a much better fit for that, what with all the bucking and riding massive bulls and what have you Anyway, I guess that shot was taking from the room, with you lying face down, aka The Recovery Position.
  3. If we signed someone called Riverwang Mountaincock I could die a happy man.
  4. In a mark of respect to Ozzy, we’ll keep this to a mild pounding of the Beige at their place. 0-5. 2 for The Headless Chook 3 for Big Willy Osula, who will cause a minor stir by biting the head off a Beige fan whilst celebrating his hat trick, claiming he thought it was a lifeless mannequin. Targett to leave the away changers an absolute midden.
  5. Nah Print this off and keep it in your wallet… Use it for the “selfie” id. When it asks you to smile, use this one. Life finds a way.
  6. It was Ketsbaia apparently. Jay Jay Sea would’ve taken the beating, then hunted them down individually and gutted them in their sleep
  7. Nearly three weeks since this came in CT almost at bursting point.
  8. Also, tell her that her laddie has been cramming her Electric Friend up his hoop, wouldn’t want her getting an infection and being more miserable
  9. I read an article on the BBC a while back about a North East metector who’d submitted a find to the Treasure dudes, and I did wonder if you’d struck lucky? https://www.bbc.com/news/av/uk-england-tyne-66239506 Maybe not
  10. He wasn’t going to pay you
  11. I’ve translated that for you as it’ll likely come in handy while you’re away… ”Sind Sie schon fertig, Idioten?” Not sure how it’ll sound through a hot sperm gargle, but that’s your problem, not mine What time is CT picking you up for the Airport?
  12. But I’m not the only one…
  13. Gemmill at about 8pm tonight when it dawns on him what kind of “Adults Only” hotel Mrs. G. has booked them. The moments that lead to this realisation. * The staff uniforms are leather biker caps, matching chest harness and backless chaps, with a Freddy Mercury tache - same for the male staff, too. * Breakfast is served in “The Playroom” * The complimentary welcome pack is a gallon of lube, waxing strips and 1kg tub of talc * Every sofa in the entire gaff is bed shaped. * When he sat on the bed in his room, it crunched. * When he mentioned to Mrs. G. there was no room service menu, and she replied “ Don’t worry, you won’t be short of protein this next two weeks”, as she tightened the waist and thigh straps of her Mandingo Spine Splitter. * Every other guest is German and over 60.
  14. And you still haven’t
  15. I was wondering if the boards original psychopathic serial killer @Jay Jay Sea had decided to join Ketsbaia on the comeback trail?
  16. I saw Taylor out walking his dog the other day
  17. They diverting the flight to Tromsø, then?
  18. G- “ It’s 11pm pet, I think we might be safe to slip out for a few late drinks?” Mrs. G opens the blinds slightly …
  19. Seems quiet- the rest of the lads must be out the back having a fag?
  20. Humidity is 52% today.… …rising to 72% tomorrow when you get there Please post pics of you in CT’s hat as you try anything and everything to avoid turning in to a crispy bacon rasher.
  21. Have you got AC in your digs? ( Of course you haven’t, it’s Greece ). Fighting your lass to sleep in the fridge.
  22. Aye, he’ll be Busan the midfield soon enough. Give him an inch(eon) and he’ll thread a pass. Run out of Korean cities, so here’s Kim Jong Un pointing at things.
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