Monkeys Fist

“If”.

My interest is piqued. Loved New Vegas, and Fallout 4, 76 can get to fuck though. If there’s settlement building in this, take my money now.

Got to give them credit for the jauntily crossed legs, though.

Get out.

Ah shit.

A lad I know was in Weardale Mountain Rescue when it happened. They helped find and recover debris and body parts from within Kielder Forest. Gruesome.

CT is out for Pub Night, on his own, annoying the fuck out of the poor bar staff. In walks Terry Fuckwit from Viz, and sits next to his brethren. After a few seconds of trying to count, they get bored and start watching the 10pm news, just as a report of some guy threatening to jump off the Tyne Bridge comes on. Terry slaps £50 down and says, ” I bet you he jumps!” CT slaps a tenner down and says ” Bet you he doesn’t! ” As soon as he’s finished speaking, the bloke on the bridge launches himself in to a swan dive and becomes pavement pizza within seconds. CT congratulates Terry and hands him his winnings. Terry guiltily says, ” I can’t take your money, fatty, I’d already seen the same report on the 6pm news” CT replies, ” Me too, but I didn’t think he’d be daft enough to jump this time.”

I didn’t know Brian Harvey had moved to Florida

So Mrs. Fist came in from work today and said, (subtle as a brick), “ Three of the girls at work had flowers delivered from their partners. They were beautiful…” I said “ That’s probably why they got the flowers.” Any ideas how to reduce the swelling on my black eye?

Take no notice of wykikitoon, folks… … hee aww, hee awwlways says that.

Any of the medical types on here know if it’s possible to donate a skin graft from my buttock to a non-family member? Just arse skin for a friend.

Mrs. Fist threatened to leave me if I didn’t stop singing Oasis songs. I said “Maybe”…

What about the Asexuals, eh?

He’s too busy trying to work out why the words “plunged around the club” make his fucking teeth itch. How is this fucking gonk a journalist?

I’m sure they’re well aware that she’s a Newcastle fan. She’s not exactly hidden it for the past twenty years.

Beaten to death by his NHS manager?

Small, bitter and unpopular. Sounds about right.

Kenyan by a country mile. Even if his bid appears to be less wealthy up front than others ( and I’m not saying it is, either), his experience of pushing clubs on to greater things is tied to maximising their commercial potential. I’d take a few seasons under him building up in a proper manner, then reaping the rewards, over some Hollywood insta-money which runs out along with the owners interest in a year or two.

How many females in this pic? Genuine question

When he comes round you should pop in and say “ Aloo, mind if I cumin?”

Well, have you?

Did you tell them you were a mod on here?

So’s this

Aye 😄 Also considerably richer than Trump. ( Mind, it would be funny to piss on the mackem’s cheesy chips and beat them in “ Who can have the biggest cunt called Donald as Owner” competition).