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Allardyce sacked.


Akabusi
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I'm bitterly disapointed that Allardyce hasn't worked out, I was fully behind his appointment as Newcastle manager, but it soon became clear that we once again had appointed the wrong man, I think the club have made a brave decision today but also a wise one.

 

9 games in for you, wasn't it? ;)

 

Maybe there was something in Ashley's agreement with Shepherd that we had to have one more season of comedy decision making at the top. The soap opera continues.

 

If we don't have someone fucking seriously good lined up as a replacement then this is an absolute joke. And if it IS Steve McClaren, my season ticket will not be getting renewed. FACTALICIOUS. If it's Shearer then we are nothing more than a laughing stock.

 

Quoted for Leazes. :razz:

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Akabusi hated trains. They made his balls ache. And they were about the only land based thing he had ever seen that was as long, hard and powerful as his dribbling beef ionic. He looked out the steamed up window at the blurry countryside as the vibrations of the journey went right up his toned onyx legs up to the recently weaved bush covering his monstrous sud carriers.

 

Before long Busi's meat and two f**king huge veg looked like Kevin Keegan impaled by a giant bum cigar and for a brief moment he passed out as every drop of his Nigerian blue blood shuffled into his genitalia quicker than Gray Thompson on black ice. It would be a shame to waste this god given erection but there was a gang of snotty kids in the same carriage so he got poor OCD riddled John Regis to pinch the end.

 

Two hours later the beast had been tamed and Akabusi went back to his well thumbed copy of his biography "f**k Me, That Kid Can Run" by Michael Crick. Regis continued playing iShylock on his portable Wii and so far had collected £4763 in rent and just over a pound of flesh or 0.498 kilogrammes to be exact. Which Regis always was. It was just a shame that the carriage had so many germs. Or 8,763,229 to be exact. Regis would scrub his shovel like hands until they bled tonight.

 

Roger Black wasn't on the train. In fact Busi hadn't seen Blackie for a few days since he had gone up to Cheshire to collect some gambling debts from the Katonas. What a pair of tits! Her and her husband had been. You borrow from Busi you will get burned and Black gets the Vig by any means necessary.

 

Busi put down his biography after he had read about the infamous Cirque de Soleil incident from 98. Busi liked circuses or circi as much as the f**king next man but he hadn't paid 200 nicker to see some frog in a leo tarding around to pan pipe moods. A circus "should include cruelty to animals, French fellas farting onto talcum powder and clowns dressed as Chris Langham". Good times. Good times.

 

Krisstopher wiped down the window. They were here. Hogsmeade was a f**king dump. Full of ropey old brass flashing grannies that looked like Gordon Ramsey's chin and Albanians selling shrooms and day trips. Busi laughed as he recalled the time he made Regis drop acid. It had gone right through his Gola trainer and the little bleeder had screamed louder than Hagrid bumming Blessed.

 

Busi was in town to deliver a motivational speech to some poxy students in their final year of the school up on the hill. A technical college or something, Busi didn't give two magic sh*ts. He was getting ten K for this and all the pussy he could eat. It would have taken 28 JJB openings and 2 Maplin's closures to make that kind of cash and that made Busi harder than a 10 year old gyppo riding on the back of a waltzer.

 

As Busi and Regis waited for the carriages up to the college they saw a queue of weirdos waiting outside the Hogsmeade Bookshop for the next Rofl Lundgren Sex Story. f**king idiots. Busi knew what happened. It always ended the same way. Clunge carnage.

 

Turned out the school was a bit huge. And full of "special" children. Not window slurpers or self harmers but magicians and elf harmers. It was like a c**t soup with magic croutons. And owls. Apparently the big man on campus was called Billy Bunter or Barry Norman or something. But Busi was here now and he would give the little f**ker a run for his money. He was going to enjoy his time at Hogtarts.

 

As he walked onto the stage for his 89 second motivational he felt the cool air of "that what should not really be talked about much" - sex - slip into his Gryffindor dungs and circle his massive hymen hurta and hairy snitches like spirits around Derek Acorah. Mainly gin. He looked down on the 17 year olds and could sense that most of the birds and a few of the owls wanted a piece of the Busi sex pie. And it was just about legal.

 

There was a ginger tard winking at him up front. Kriss was glad the kid from Mask had lost weight. His mum Cher would be pleased. Next to him was berty big bollocks or Terry Grotbags. He really didn't care what the squeaky little f**ker was called. He just knew he had a much bigger penis and that is what mattered to men. And Busi. As was Busi's wont he let slip his dungs at the climax of the speech and let his slythering pranny pounder fall to the heavy stone floor like their old headmaster - Professor McClusky. He stood there like a chocolate centaur standing on his hind legs about to enter Desert Orchid. Dead or alive.

 

"Enormous erectionanus!" shouted a voice from the back of the hall. Busi's instantly became harder than blood diamonds and just as shiny. He filled the room with a gigantic meat chimney that Fred Dibnah would have had trouble blowing up. Especially as he was brown bread. A small figure stepped forward.

 

Hermoine Granger was definitely 18. Maybe even 17. But she was definitely 18. And she was smokin hot magma formed into the shape of a six former. Busi knew beneath that tight jumper was a pair of bristols like two O2 Arenas fighting and a clunge tighter than two jocks on an early morning Easyjet flight to Palma. Busi's offal wand quivered as he was drawn towards Granger, helmet first.

 

And boy did Busi have helmet thirst. His japs was gasping like Hiroshima residents for eye drops. "Clothus flingoffus" roared Busi as he landed near Hermoine. And they did. She stood there like a beautiful female greyhound with a tits like philosopher's stones and areolae as bumpy and as hot as a landing at Sao Paulo.

 

He dug in. And lept on her like chocolate leaping frogs. His hands were all over her like Cerberus on three scouse kids. She wasn't shy and Billy Rotter looked over at Krisstopher with a wink. She'd been around the school more times than nits. Within hours Busi was on his vigorous vinegars and he let fly with such a gush of nad sauce that Voldermort was knocked clean out and all the kids started laying into him. He was a f**king dead man.

 

Roger Black appeared out of nowhere in a flying Corsa. Turns out he was Sirrus's younger brother and sh*t. Regis piled in. Busi rolled up his seven volume saga and slipped on his sodden dungs. He always knew how this would end.

 

Krisstopher Malcolm Akabusi looked down on the twisted pile of giant spunk bubbles, long matted hair, smashed in back doors, Dark Arts and a clunge wetter than a plunge pool on the Titantic, knelt down onto his powerful black magic knee, whispered "Awooga" in her ear and patted her on the fanny.

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I'd like Klinsmann, but I suspect it will be Jol. McClaren was watching one our games the other day...

 

Klinsmann is only marginally more proven than Shearer tbh. We want someone with a track record or else we should have stuck with Allardyce.

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I had to stop reading the thread because you're all putting a downer on this for me.

 

I read the first page beore leaving work and though I didn't believe it, I still got a bit of excitement because Akabusi knows his shit.

 

Before I got to the end of the street I had 3 texts confirming it off sky news and I had a skip in my step all the way home. People on the metro thought I was a grinning loon.

 

Absoloutley delighted to see the back off the fat, arrogant, clueless, obstinate, tedious, lying, bung taking scumbag.

 

;):razz:;):crazypilot::icon_lol:

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What was it that he went for?

 

Media pressure?

Results?

Football Style?

Fan Pressure?

 

I wonder if it was part results and part football style. It not being what Mike wanted to see from his team? JM isnt the most attacking minded btw. Shearer has hinted as much that he would be (or rather thats what we want).

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I'm bitterly disapointed that Allardyce hasn't worked out, I was fully behind his appointment as Newcastle manager, but it soon became clear that we once again had appointed the wrong man, I think the club have made a brave decision today but also a wise one.

 

9 games in for you, wasn't it? ;)

 

Maybe there was something in Ashley's agreement with Shepherd that we had to have one more season of comedy decision making at the top. The soap opera continues.

 

If we don't have someone fucking seriously good lined up as a replacement then this is an absolute joke. And if it IS Steve McClaren, my season ticket will not be getting renewed. FACTALICIOUS. If it's Shearer then we are nothing more than a laughing stock.

 

Quoted for Leazes. :razz:

 

I don't get it?

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I had to stop reading the thread because you're all putting a downer on this for me.

 

I read the first page beore leaving work and though I didn't believe it, I still got a bit of excitement because Akabusi knows his shit.

 

Before I got to the end of the street I had 3 texts confirming it off sky news and I had a skip in my step all the way home. People on the metro thought I was a grinning loon.

 

Absoloutley delighted to see the back off the fat, arrogant, clueless, obstinate, tedious, lying, bung taking scumbag.

 

;):crazypilot::icon_lol: :icon_lol: :P

 

;):razz:

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I'd like Klinsmann, but I suspect it will be Jol. McClaren was watching one our games the other day...

 

Klinsmann is only marginally more proven than Shearer tbh. We want someone with a track record or else we should have stuck with Allardyce.

 

Sams track record wasn't super hot tbh. Did well with a small club on a limited budget with limited style of football. Polar opposites.

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I'm bitterly disapointed that Allardyce hasn't worked out, I was fully behind his appointment as Newcastle manager, but it soon became clear that we once again had appointed the wrong man, I think the club have made a brave decision today but also a wise one.

 

9 games in for you, wasn't it? ;)

 

Maybe there was something in Ashley's agreement with Shepherd that we had to have one more season of comedy decision making at the top. The soap opera continues.

 

If we don't have someone fucking seriously good lined up as a replacement then this is an absolute joke. And if it IS Steve McClaren, my season ticket will not be getting renewed. FACTALICIOUS. If it's Shearer then we are nothing more than a laughing stock.

 

Quoted for Leazes. :razz:

 

I don't get it?

 

There, I just quoted it again. He seems to think nobody is disappointed by this, 'only the fat bastard did it' etc.

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Horrible timing. We desperately need players in. Who the hell is going to sign them?

 

Do we really need any players? On paper it looks like a decent set. Maybe he can get the best out of them in a decent formation. Season is just a complete write off tbh. Was about 5 games ago.

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Those idiots on sky chanting Shearer - anyone know who it is? I want to kick the living shit out of them, the embarrassing tossers.

 

Im not even going to switch over to see. Imagine if its not? They will be turning their backs on him right away. goons shouting for AL on sky is exactly what they want.... ;)

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I had to stop reading the thread because you're all putting a downer on this for me.

 

I read the first page beore leaving work and though I didn't believe it, I still got a bit of excitement because Akabusi knows his shit.

 

Before I got to the end of the street I had 3 texts confirming it off sky news and I had a skip in my step all the way home. People on the metro thought I was a grinning loon.

 

Absoloutley delighted to see the back off the fat, arrogant, clueless, obstinate, tedious, lying, bung taking scumbag.

 

;):crazypilot::icon_lol: :icon_lol: :P

 

;):razz:

 

You don't know how hard it's been for me man.

 

Absoloutley loathe the odious twat.

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Horrible timing. We desperately need players in. Who the hell is going to sign them?

 

Do we really need any players? On paper it looks like a decent set. Maybe he can get the best out of them in a decent formation. Season is just a complete write off tbh. Was about 5 games ago.

Could do with some creativity in midfield like.

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I'd like Klinsmann, but I suspect it will be Jol. McClaren was watching one our games the other day...

 

Klinsmann is only marginally more proven than Shearer tbh. We want someone with a track record or else we should have stuck with Allardyce.

 

I don't see what the fuss is about Klinsmann tbh. Fair enough he did well with Germany in the World Cup, played nice attacking football, correct me if I'm wrong but before the World Cup wasn't he on the verge of the sack?

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Horrible timing. We desperately need players in. Who the hell is going to sign them?

 

Do we really need any players? On paper it looks like a decent set. Maybe he can get the best out of them in a decent formation. Season is just a complete write off tbh. Was about 5 games ago.

 

Id like to think that any manager could see we needed some creativity in midfield. Other than that, I reckon you could get that side playing half decent football.

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FFS, SSN reading out all the texts from fans saying how it's the wrong decision and how we need stability despite being one of the media outlets heaping pressure on him in recent months saying that the majority of fans were baying for his blood.

 

I'm not sure if you've seen this message board recently, but it appears that a lot of the people in this thread who are lamenting the decision are the same ones who thought Sam was a waste of space. Just saying.

 

Well said mate iv notice a distinct smell of hypocracy lately too, not naming names like ;)

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I'd like Klinsmann, but I suspect it will be Jol. McClaren was watching one our games the other day...

 

Klinsmann is only marginally more proven than Shearer tbh. We want someone with a track record or else we should have stuck with Allardyce.

 

Sams track record wasn't super hot tbh. Did well with a small club on a limited budget with limited style of football. Polar opposites.

 

He had a track record though is my point. i.e We knew he could operate in the Premiership. Klinsmann would be an enormous gamble, and given that the last manager barely made it to half a season, we're not in a position to be taking a punt on some bloke that may or may not have just had a spawny run as the home team in a competition that Germany ALWAYS go deep in.

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