snakehips

FUCK ME! Is it 19 years?? Jings! We must be due a new one now. It is only around 5 years, or so, that they 'downsized' the badge to the piddly little thing we have now. Done, of course, to save on costs and increase profit from us - fletchertastic

Football clubs like Arsenal changed their badge because of copyright. No-one knew who held the copyright for the orginal cannon etc and due to shirt sales bringing in a lot of cash they were terrified of some fuckwit appearing one day with the copyright and demanding loadsamoney!! Not sure if NUFC changed theirs for the same reason (Christ, they must have changed the badge here about four or five times since I started supporting them - oldfantastic ). Perhaps boro are changing theirs due to copyright. Who knows?

you can tell your in dire need of a shag !!! Too right, baby!!! The monster's (no, honest! ) straining at his chain The next lucky lass that gets hold of me will get the wax blown out of her ears! That's my last word on the subject, I promise

Revenge for giving a blow job? Are you forced, like? As for a good snog following a good blow job - no problem. It's not like she will have been saving it in her mouth, is it? Anyway, there are three types of blow job. 1. as part of lovemaking which doesn't involve shooting one's load in her mouth. 2. When you do fill her gob with seed and she swallows. 3. When you fill her gob and she spits it oot. Personally, I've never come across girl #3. I've often wondered what she did afterwards. Does she gargle? Does she politely ask (like a crap ventriloquist who has just sipped half a glass of milk) if you have a recepticle for the 'deposit'? Does she gently, and as ladylike as possible, transfer it to a hankie or towel or cloth of some description? Or does she simply launch the 'product' across the room in any direction? Questions, question. The final resting place of girl #3's mouth contents probably depends on where she's brought up (no pun intended!). Lord knows what the skanks on here get up to!!!

Revenge for giving a blow job? Are you forced, like? As for a good snog following a good blow job - no problem. It's not like she will have been saving it in her mouth, is it? Anyway, there are three types of blow job. 1. as part of lovemaking which doesn't involve shooting one's load in her mouth. 2. When you do fill her gob with seed and she swallows. 3. When you fill her gob and she spits it oot. Personally, I've never come across girl #3. I've often wondered what she did afterwards. Does she gargle? Does she politely ask (like a crap ventriloquist who has just sipped half a glass of milk) if you have a recepticle for the 'deposit'? Does she gently, and as ladylike as possible, transfer it to a hankie or towel or cloth of some description? Or does she simply launch the 'product' across the room in any direction? Questions, question. The final resting place of girl #3's mouth contents probably depends on where she's brought up (no pun intended!). Lord knows what the skanks on here get up to!!!

Says he's heard from contacts there are loads of golf courses in the n.e. and he cannot stand fuckin' golf. I'll get me coat.

*adopts Richard Burton voice* "Broadsword to Dannyboy. Broadsword to Dannyboy. Come in Dannyboy." Sorry. I'll get me coat

Another Anal classic 'Glenn phoned me..' Yeah, Anal, to make it sound like Rodders called you as you're his big mate. Maybe if you had told us the truth in that Rodders had merely called you in response to you bombarding his answer machine with pleads of a call back, the readers would have the full story. And what's this about Rodders mowing his wife's front lawn??

1. Has had no female contact in over a month 2. Could really do with a shag right now 3. No, could really, really do with a shag right now 4. Feels sad at the prospect of at least another month without a shag 5. Contemplating PM-ing Jimbo for different techniques advice in this hour of need.

INTERNETEXPLORER-TASTIC !!!!!!!!!!!!!111111111111 Thanks 'tmags, you're help has done the business. Yo da maaaaaaaaaan! The lad I sent to do the necessary said it was easy to follow. However a couple of things were different at the end of the help sheet but he just by-passed them and all seems to be working okay now. I owe you a beer. Or the people who use the particular pc in question do! I'll let them know to buy you a pint the next time they see you Cheers

Because, 2Jokes, I am on the pc at the top of the network and the pc that is passworded/blocked is at the end of the network. I, perhaps (only perhaps, as I'm sure the more intelligent and not so young amongst us! probably understood my message) didn't explain the situation well enough. But now you know. As I said, any help. And less of the old, laddie

Brief synopsis: At work we have a cable-connected network, all using the internet off one main pc. A former colleague (well, tosser really) has enabled the Content Advisor, on one pc, of the network thus making it impossible to ready any page off the internet. The block is passworded with us having no knowledge of the password. Is there any way to circumvent the password?? Or, can anyone give details of how to un-install Internet Explorer on the particular pc and then re-install it?? It would help us greatly if anyone could shed any light on this problem. Unfortunately, I wont be able to answer straight away due to operational commitments, but please post anything that you can think of that may help. I'll get back to you as soon as I can. Cheers

You can just picture the scene. Somewhere in Spain. Shearer's mobile rings and he looks at the screen to see who is calling. He turns to whoever is with him, rolls his eyes ( ) and says, 'It's that tosser Oliver again".

As 10cc sang: He didn't do it, he wasn't there. He didn't want it, he wouln't dare. Sorted!! Then, as Sham 69 (I think?) sang: ...we're going down the pub....

N.O.G. rock and don't you forget it!! Back on topic, though, this is a fuckin' disgrace. However many Chewsee and Blackbum sell respectively should be recorded and the same number should be allocated the next time they get this far in the competition. So if the mighty 'blues' come up against a big team, or Blackbum get a team they think they will beat they only get the same number of tickets the tossers sell this time. Arseholes. Will be funny to see Wembley half-full in future semi finals

HBTY, HBTY, HBDTL....HBTY

Sorry to hear you're having to work . Rest assured, though, we all appreciate the sterling work the nurses do. However, PARTYTIME FOR US LOT!!! WOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

HBTY, HBTY, HBDB....HBTY

We believe you go away Awwww, we loves ya really

What annoyed me about Gates was the obvious put on 'laughing uncontrollably whilst banging his fist on the table' at any suppoesed humourous slight aimed at NUFC

To be reduced upon appeal.

I'm not trying to be funny here, but was Sidwell the midfielder who Emre ran away from on more than one occasion (with the ball, I might add) when we played Reading at SJP ?? If so, he didn't look out special [imo]

What? There are three threads on the first page alone with the same subject line. I can't be the only one that thinks it's completely fucking retarded. There is the benefit of seeing the title and knowing what is coming (usually a shit joke, compared to mine ) so not having to bother checking it, though.

We believe you

*Robocop voice* "Dead or alive, you're coming with me." Pity they couldn't have some sort of acid spray attached to drench the scumbags.