Ayatollah Hermione

Anyone on the virginity fleet down to London today?

Lol towards anyone that pays the TV license as well. Especially in the past couple of years when they haven’t been allowed to check the gaff due to COVID. The latest series of Line of Duty was so shite that I’m going to go another year without paying, I think

Never mind that nonsense, my GP pedalled me the other month because I’d moved out of the catchment area. Despite the catchment area being 5 miles and me moving a mile up the road so I’m having to duel wield between miserable gobshite receptionists in order to get any sort of Covid passport happening since nothing is showing up. I fucking wish I had seagulls in my middle class gaff

Keep seeing him in Shields. Last of which was him glass eyed in Lowlights. Good lad

Nice photo of him on his mams staircase, the fucking buffoon

Got to say like, I’ve been creased laughing at the lot who have been refusing to wear masks and get the jab who are now suffering with COVID. Fuck the lot of them

Pure Yorkshire

Granted, I did have two weeks off last April before testing was a thing but that was ages ago. I want to be pinged for when the Olympics starts

Get some lemon juice on a lateral flow and take that time off, baby. We’re the ones who have had to go into work every day for 18 months with this cunt flying about, we deserve it

Got to admit like, I’m praying to be pinged by the app. As long as I don’t get symptoms like, 10 days in the house sounds unreal at the minute

Aye, teams in the Championship have a bit of money these days tbf

So, should we have replaced Walker or not? Rashford shouldn’t have come on for ten minutes but we also should have put our attackers on? Eh?

Aye, the changes needed to come earlier and it wouldn’t have been Rice off if it was me. Still can’t get over the pens; a teenager taking the decider, two players who he obviously didn’t trust enough to play actual minutes before them. Anyway, my head is pounding, I’m going back to bed. Good result for the Scottish, mind

Genuinely preposterous how Saka was ahead of Grealish or Stones. I thought we had specific penalty coaches? If so, they need sacking. Surely Rashford and Sancho should have been one 5 minutes before, in an attempt to get them a few touches and into the speed of the game, at least? Instead of just letting them take a pen, cold, against a keeper who probably had them sussed

We’ll definitely cope in indoor, air conditioned stadiums, like. Right as the European teams are fully fit leading into what would be the Xmas period. A European team will definitely win the 2022 World Cup.

Here man, you’re a terminal sad bastard. Can’t grief the mackem keeper so you blame the kid with the big nose because you assume he’s Jewish. Get a fucking grip, you sad old racist bag of shit

Think the back 5 might work since I think these will fly out the blocks and we’re going to need to stifle them. It also means that we change to the four if need be. I also fancy Kane and Sterling to turn up. Believe, my man

This is the kind of night where I’m furious that I’ve been instilled with conscious thought and nerve endings

I’ve thought this in literally every game and we’re in the final so I’m reserving judgement

Will they still deliver at midnight when I stumble in?

Can’t be doing with this. Think I prefer Newcastle’s method of just getting knocked out so I can avoid the stress

I bought an Boca Juniors one and it has “Elite Pefodmance for Elite Athletes” on the tag so I got lucky there. On the other hand, got put away one the other year and it was identical

The DHGate snides are still the best alternative if you’re playing five a side or are finally able to go to an away game. Just buy a couple for when the first one inevitably wrinkles in the wash

Space Jam was released in 1996 and we made the Euro Semi Finals. Space Jam 2 has dropped in 2021 and we've made the final. Hard to believe these two things aren’t linked.

My Spotify playlists are getting out of hand, it’s the greatest feature in the world considering people are curating unbelievably specific and varied playlists. Like this one with garage from the 80s onwards Or this 261 hour long “Non-Shit Americana/RnB” playlist