Ayatollah Hermione

Dough Exotic, more like

For people who’ve had second jabs, how fine did they cut it before contacting you? My cut off is the 8th and I’ve heard nowt yet.

Think it’s fairly clear that the Bruce deal was borne out of spite to the fans with him assuming he’d be sold up and not have to deal with the fallout. Serves the fat cunt right tbh

Off to put 20 quid on North Macedonia getting out of their group. In with Holland, Ukraine and Austria. Piece of piss

Straight to 5 at the back And not a single introduction of fresh legs to the attack

Southgate could have made some attacking changes here if he hadn’t took 15 defenders and left Hudson-Odoi to waste his time in the U21s

The only way you could prefer cheese on toast to pizza is if you had somehow travelled into the future from 1978 and hadn’t actually processed everything yet.

These are an absolutely astonishingly mental last few pages. Heard the “Italian food is shit” take and actually had to go for a lie down

That Phillips is the kind of side-side-back pass merchant that would make Leon Brittain proud

Fucking Southgate’s teams, man. Two holding players against Albania with absolutely zero movement up front Like giving me the keys to a Ferrari, wouldn’t know what to fucking do with it and it wouldn’t see it’s potential even touched

Mustn’t have existed then, Alex

He’s half way through his slab of Carling already

Fucking mental just how much #respect has to happen before any game of football can kick off these days. Blokes who died in 2007 getting a mention if nobody has died in the previous week

There will be no jokes about Jessica Walter as a result of how hilarious she was in Arrested Development. Those are the rules

I have a funny story about a team being relegated to League One

Emil, is that you?

I’d bet people any money that, when he’s sitting on his arse in the house, him or none of his little cronies are watching Saturday’s match or any of Spurs’ last few games. Probably sitting with ITV Racing on all day.

I thought he was fantastic during Liverpool’s recent height. Can barely recall him losing the ball but nearly every pass was positive.

I have a hangover that would kill a lesser man, someone like Gemmill for instance, and the fact Bruce hasn’t been sacked is a feeling 100x worse

Well, i learned how to play the drums by being drafted into a blues band and had to busk my way through most of Morrison Hotel so my advice is to do the opposite of that. I’ll have some proper advice when I wake up tomorrow.

Aye, it’s weird how everyone can understand that big hairy lad though

I’m telling you; produce a fleet of mobile vaccine vehicles and send them round Germany’s estates like ice cream vans. Job done.

It’ll be a draw tonight btw. And Bruce will claim it’s a good result despite Brighton remaining a point ahead with a far healthier goal difference

Not to mention drinking from one of the cans seems to cause fatal damage

Bruce’s statements are becoming increasingly bizarre because he’s never been in this position for so long without being sacked. His ability to take teams on a downward spiral for the payoff money is so perfected that he’s completely lost now that it hasn’t worked.