Ayatollah Hermione

Poetry.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g0koQ4k1__Q What a straight up banger. Someone should throw this in a DJ set and see if anyone even notices it's from 1992. And a Mega Drive game.

The only conspiracy for me is how they've been even worse than I expected.

Two things Ryder wishes he was

My mate started his CV saying "Congratulations, you've just won the CV lottery!"

They pump it full of toxic materials so we can cultivate a culture of superheroes. We've been through this

Aye, all the good bits. I thought you'd be more receptive following your calamitous cupboard concoction.

CT, how much between 1-10, do you like PEK?

CT, if your newborn child had put all of those ingredients in a pan because he didn't know any better, I'd understand but howay, son. Just nip to the NISA and get what you need to make pasta.

You mean "absolutely class stuff" We're a robot butler away from living in the future.

Return of the double cheeseburger effort from CT That weigh-in at Grainger Market shouldn't happen over the next couple of days if he wants to win that bet.

Could be time for a Netto revival in that case.

Just bring the roomba into work and then they'll see that you're as lazy and work shy as ever.

eh? So, as an independent adjudicator, I have to watch you get weighed and then pay up to the Bobby Robson Foundation?! I know for a fact that, despite the weight loss, your torso resembles a split couch so I'm not paying up but I'd like to video tape you in Grainger Market nontheless

:lol: Wearing nothing to try and shave an extra couple of pounds off.

Can I come round and have a try? of the whisky, I mean.

I want a picture of CT wearing a pair of his old jeans, pulling the waist out and smiling.

I'd want Linkin Park on repeat because I'd wake up faster to turn it off.

Buskers night rule #2: Stick to 12 bar blues when jamming with strangers. It'll be incredibly boring but everyone in the audience will be impressed.

I see we've moved past the music thing to jury service. I haven't been on jury service but I've been at their mercy many a time for unrelated sex charges.

Playing a piece of music by ear is 100x more complex than where you're at now and that's an absolute fact, I don't care how quickly you can play Fur Elise. Playing by ear would be if you sat and listened to Beethoven's 5th with a piano in front of you and replicated it within 5 minutes. So, it takes a virtuoso to be able to do it.

Get away, man.

CT would trek through the ravaged street to a library in Sunderland and set up shop there for a year.

The article conveniently forgets the context to each window too. What was he expecting from our first season back up, for instance? I mean, the kid's just trying to make himself look mint, possibly so he can get a job for Football Manager's "research" team but any half-decent writer, not looking for attention, wouldn't bother himself. Comes from that school of thought that thinks "This player is highly rated with a potential of 198. I bet he'd fit in ANY team!" You can criticise Ashley's Newcastle United for a lot but the players we've signed since coming up is not one of them. The "Richard Smith" comment gets it bang on actually.

Croutons? Batons, more like.