Isegrim

The time for signing bad players is never right, either if five months in advance or in the last minutes of deadline day. Liverpool seem to have an affection for crap strikers from Germany: Dundee, Meijer and now Voronin.

Not that I care, but live coverage on a news channel? WTF?

The huge amount of bookings in Spanish football is ridiculous. http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/e...lts/default.stm

Good that everybody on here has his own agenda regarding certain players. We should split them equally. Dan has Martins, MattM4 has Ameobi, I have Emre, Baggio has Duff, so there are still plenty left... So you think he played well then? I didn't see it tbh. But from what I picked up at the radio and others said it didn't sound as he was playing particularly bad.

Good that everybody on here has his own agenda regarding certain players. We should split them equally. Dan has Martins, MattM4 has Ameobi, I have Emre, Baggio has Duff, so there are still plenty left...

Lazy bastids. I actually do most of my work at weekends when nobody is disturbing me in my office. Take that for job happiness.

Club "planning" to offer said cancer who is und contract until 2010 a new (surely improved) deal shocker

Do you ever post comments about him when he's had a good game? It seems you can't wait to criticise the lad and pick holes in his game. Was to be expected after putting up the odds of him scoring a hattrick, wasn't it... (NB: I am pleasantly surprised so far, although thinking there is still a lot of room for improvement - something I wouldn't say about a player with the necessary talent by the way)

Good riddance.

Among the scarves probably they also handed out some tbh. The bit about Bellamy only proves that statistics prove nothing...

The thing is that we all know that Bramble is able to put in decent performances - even against teams who are actually of a decent standard. The problem is that Bramble has never in his life managed to perform consistently and therefore is seen as constant threat- for his own team.

He has done really well this season. I wouldn't mind to see him next to a real creative midfielder.

You can take the boy out of Chelsea, but you can't take...

"Let the Anti-Roeder infidels bask in their illusion" Mohammed Patrokles al-Sahaf, Geordie-Nation's minister of information.

I think it caused more pain to the supporters watching him "play", because he could barely move at the end. To see him still being put on a football pitch was shocking tbh.

Best two-footed player I've ever seen. Even miles ahead of Maldini in that regard imho.

You don't accept my point about goal ratios (fair enough), I can't figure out your point about medals (mine is that theyre largely meaningless-How many European Cups has Seedorf won/how many World Cups did George Best have a chance at winning) and beyond that you'll concede that neither of us have submitted a detailed treaties on the art or science of goalscoring. Your initial post was simply that Muller should be in ahead of Shearer. It's about opinions basically. For what it's worth my view is based on their technical abilities coupled with their ability to put the ball in the back of the net. If all other conditions were equal I would say you would be extremely hard placed to distinguish between them. With the difference that many goals of Müller were crucial. I don't think anyone here in Germany could think of the successes of the German and Bayern teams in the 70s without the deciding goals from Müller, especially in tense finals and crucial matches. I think that is what Shearer lacks, important matches where he was the deciding factor.

Muller played for Bayern Munich and West Germany Shearer played for Newcastle United and England Compare the achievements of the teams over their respective playing periods and tell me which ones it was easier to score for fun in. Look at what Bayern Munich were before Muller joined them. And Beckenbauer Beckenbauer has said in the past Bayern would have been nowhere without Muller. Do you think Beckenbauer would come out and say they'd have been nowhere without himself though? Yes. He comes out and says a lot things, mostly not knowing what he wanted to say at the end of the sentence. He also said that they (he) had been nowhere without their hard working defender 'Katsche' Schwarzenbeck and midfield player 'Bulle' Roth as well as goalie Sepp Maier who all came through the ranks with Beckenbauer and Müller and formed the team that won everything unto the mid 70s.

What exactly were you expecting from accountancy? A jet-set lifestyle meeting some of the world's most beautiful women while completing extreme accountancy tasks in some of the dangerous warzones in the world? I did this on the old toontastic before, but... Counsellor: Ah Mr Gemmill. Do sit down. Gemmill: Thank you. Take the weight off the feet, eh? Counsellor: Yes, yes. Gemmill: Lovely weather for the time of year, I must say. Counsellor: Enough of this gay banter. And now Mr Gemmill, you asked us to advise you which job in life you were best suited for. Gemmill: That is correct, yes. Counsellor: Well I now have the results here of the interviews and the aptitude tests that you took last week, and from them we've built up a pretty clear picture of the sort of person that you are. And I think I can say, without fear of contradiction, that the ideal job for you is chartered accountancy. Gemmill: But I am a chartered accountant. Counsellor: Jolly good. Well back to the office with you then. Gemmill: No! No! No! You don't understand. I've been a chartered accountant for the last twenty years. I want a new job. Something exciting that will let me live. Counsellor: Well chartered accountancy is rather exciting isn't it? Gemmill: Exciting? No it's not. It's dull. Dull. Dull. My God it's dull, it's so desperately dull and tedious and stuffy and boring and des-per-ate-ly DULL. Counsellor: Well, er, yes Mr Gemmill, but you see your report here says that you are an extremely dull person. You see, our experts describe you as an appallingly dull fellow, unimaginative, timid, lacking in initiative, spineless, easily dominated, no sense of humour, tedious company and irrepressibly drab and awful. And whereas in most professions these would be considerable drawbacks, in chartered accountancy they are a positive boon. Gemmill: But don't you see, I came here to find a new job, a new life, a new meaning to my existence. Can't you help me? Counsellor: Well, do you have any idea of what you want to do? Gemmill: Yes, yes I have. Counsellor: What? Gemmill: (boldly) Lion taming. Counsellor: Well yes. Yes. Of course, it's a bit of a jump isn't it? I mean, er, chartered accountancy to lion taming in one go. You don't think it might be better if you worked your way towards lion taming, say, via banking? Gemmill: No, no, no, no. No. I don't want to wait. At nine o'clock tomorrow I want to be in there, taming. Counsellor: Fine, fine. But do you, do you have any qualifications? Gemmill: Yes, I've got a hat. Counsellor: A hat? Gemmill: Yes, a hat. A lion taming hat. A hat with 'lion tamer' on it. I got it at Harrods. And it lights up saying 'lion tamer' in great big neon letters, so that you can tame them after dark when they're less stroppy. Counsellor: I see, I see. Gemmill: And you can switch it off during the day time, and claim reasonable wear and tear as allowable professional expenses under paragraph 335C... Counsellor: Yes, yes, yes, I do follow, Mr Gemmill, but you see the snag is... if I now call Mr Chipperfield and say to him, 'look here, I've got a forty-five-year-old chartered accountant with me who wants to become a lion tamer', his first question is not going to be 'does he have his own hat?' He's going to ask what sort of experience you've had with lions. Gemmill: Well I... I've seen them at the zoo. Counsellor: Good, good, good. Gemmill: Lively brown furry things with short stumpy legs and great long noses. I don't know what all the fuss is about, I could tame one of those. They look pretty tame to start with. Counsellor: And these, er, these lions, how high are they? Gemmill: (indicating a height of one foot) Well they're about so high, you know. They don't frighten me at all. Counsellor: Really. And do these lions eat ants? Gemmill: Yes, that's right. Counsellor: Er, well, Mr Gemmill, I'm afraid what you've got hold of there is an anteater. Gemmill: A what? Counsellor: An anteater. Not a lion. You see a lion is a huge savage beast, about five feet high, ten feet long, weighing about four hundred pounds, running forty miles per hour, with masses of sharp pointed teeth and nasty long razor-sharp claws that can rip your belly open before you can say 'Eric Robinson', and they look like THIS ! Counsellor: Now, shall I call Mr Chipperfield? Gemmill: Er, no, no, no. I think your idea of making the transition to lion taming via easy stages, say via insurance... Counsellor: Or banking. Gemmill: Or banking, yes, yes, banking that's a man's life, isn't it? Banking, travel, excitement, adventure, thrills, decisions affecting people's lives. Counsellor: Jolly good, well, er, shall I put you in touch with a bank? Gemmill: Yes. Counsellor: Fine. Gemmill: No, no, no. Look, er, it's a big decision, I'd like a couple of weeks to think about it... er... you know, don't want to jump into it too quickly. Maybe three weeks. I could let you know definitely then, I just don't want to make this definite decision. I'm er... (continues muttering nervously to himself) Counsellor: (turning to camera) Well this is just one of the all too many cases on our books of chartered accountancy. The only way that we can fight this terrible debilitating social disease, is by informing the general public of its consequences, by showing young people that it's just not worth it. So, so please... give generously... to this address: The League for Fighting Chartered Accountancy, 55 Lincoln House, Basil Street, London, SW3.

Now guys, to play the game fairly you should slag off each others knowledge in guitars, otherwise this thread has lost his legs...

What Patrokles and AF said tbf tbh...

This from Bayer Leverkusen tonight is fucking awful. Believe me, it's even one of the better ones - if such a thing exists.

Don't know, I could easily earn double the money I earn now taking a job at a huge law firm. Though, I would hardly find much time to spend the money and probably suffer from a stroke or burn out syndrome in about ten years time. No thanks. I suppose the assumption was you were good enough to do the high paying job Ok, my GREAT loafing skills would probably be a big hindrance. Having said that, I am currently applying for a job which will result in having much less time to pester internet forums whenever I want to.

Don't know, I could easily earn double the money I earn now taking a job at a huge law firm. Though, I would hardly find much time to spend the money and probably suffer from a stroke or burn out syndrome in about ten years time. No thanks.

Where are Patrokles and AF when you really need them...