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  2. has anyone heard about the man who fell in a well? i guess he couldn't see that well
  3. It would be mad enough anyway but that’s obviously direct trains on the line that connects the English and Scottish capital cities
  4. Today
  5. Just had to book five separate tickets to get the best fare on a Peterborough-Newcastle return next month. Perfectly normal rail system, definitely not broken at all.
  6. She was in a big hoody and looked harassed to fuck trying to negotiate the pushchair through the station. Meanwhile, our boy was looking pristine and unruffled in a grey tracksuit, carrying a small rucksack.
  7. Centurion walks in behind him, holds up two fingers and says ” Five beers please”
  8. Don't try and let on you didn't take a picture of his woman's knockers. Come on, share the wealth.
  9. So if the FA were told about this in the Autumn apparently, why has it taken so long for this shite to come out?
  10. How long have the FA known about this btw? Sitting on it until there are 10 games of the season left is taking the piss. As is docking points from Forest/Everton half way through a relegation battle whilst taking forever to put a sanction on City
  11. Those of us thoroughly secure in our sexuality can carry these things off with aplomb mate We also completely understand those who have difficulty with this sort of thing… DM me 😘
  12. My gifts aren't working but believe me when I say, you were getting a Steven Seagal one in response to this.
  13. Let's remind ourselves about THAT SHIRT before we go throwing accusations of campness around.
  14. Seeing as he's banned for the first two games of next season I wouldn't bet on it. Geddit? Geddit? Oh I give up.
  15. Yeah but am very calm when I’m saying it and there’s fuck all we as fans can do anyway. You’re as usual metaphorically sat on top of a Christmas tree covered in glitter shouting “DONT PANIC” like some sort of camp Corporal Jones
  16. Everton's next FFP hearing is coming up, give Gemmill some space.
  17. I was down there signing a record deal with a major label if you must know.
  18. A Roman walks in to a bar and says “I’ll have a martinus.” The bartender says “you mean a martini?” The Roman replies “no, if I wanted a double I would have asked for one.”
  19. Spotted at King's Cross by yours truly yesterday, with his missus and a kid in a pushchair. He needs to start living like a millionaire and getting a limo, not pissing about with trains.
  20. https://www.instagram.com/p/C5DqGsqM2BM/?igsh=MWh1dDgxdXp1ajEybg==
  21. I'm the one calming things, SLUMLORD! You're the one saying "I think he's fucked". Apologise.
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