Dr Gloom

i've met most of the big players in the world of european politics over the last few years in my job, among them blair, sarkozy, merkel, trichet plus loads of the uk politicians - daring, the two millibands, cameron, brown, boris, et al. without a doubt my favourite famous person i've met is ian holloway

i thought that was a joke at first like. unbelievable decision

of that lot i can see enrique and barton going next season. even assuming that doesn't happen, we still need cover at left back, two first choice strikers, another right back plus a new winger or two. ideally we'll get rid of smith and fetch in another centre midfielder too. basically, we need reinforcements in pretty much every position.

he should share the facts or stfu

I always used to laugh at sven's adult books as a nipper. I've yet to meet a Geordie called Sven. Must be some dirty old scandinavian type.

He's having a laugh with that last post, must be

We are safe now. It would be a monumental fuck up even by our standards to go down from this position.

Fuck off man

great result. we're safe now i reckon. i fancied we'd do well tonight. hung on second half a bit but thought on the first half we deserved a point. that was never a pen at the end either. not in a million years. no doubt the man u wankathon will continue and it will turn into the 'big talking point'. i reckon this is the worst man u side to win the title in years. really average by their standards. shows that the standard in this year' premiership has been generally not that great.

STOP CALLING THEM UNITED! THERE'S TWO FUCKING UNITEDS ON THE PITCH

nice chorus of "one greedy bastard" directed at owen

not only that but we have to put up with fat sam's banal musings for 90 minutes. so far he's treated us to such insightful insights as "he really would have liked to have hit the target there". dick

It might be this glorious weather we're enjoying has blurred my senses but I've got a weird feeling we might win this.

the fat duck is the best restaurant i've ever been too. i'm surprised it's down so much, the others making up the top 5 must be something special. of the others on the list i've only been to daniel and hibiscus. i'm surprised daniel is 11th actually. i've been to far better michelin star restaurants in the UK, benares, la gavroche, la manoir aux quat saisons and helene darroze at the connaught ...to name a few

The kids are alright. Excellent 9/10

Not sure about the 352 experiments either. Doesn't really work in the modern game. /papalazaru

He's a puppet. I don't blame him for taking the job though, he was desperate and no other premier league club was going to hire him in the near future. Good to see he hasn't fucked up hughton's good work so far - he's done well to maintain the team spirit, which I was worried might take a hit after hughton was axed against the players' wishes. He needs to be given a bit of money to invest before we can really judge him otherwise it's a case of how far above the relegation battle he can keep us. If the current low level of investment in t he playing staff continues then a mid table finish will always be considered a good one, so fair play to both chris h and pardew if their combined efforts mean we end up finishing closer to the top than the bottom this season.

you're giving it away tbh

Who would they be, not me, I can "understand" what's been going on, but having "faith" in him is s stretch. All I like about him is the depth of his pockets. What's the use in deep pockets if he doesn't put his hands in them to sign players?

i'd say "don't listen to any of the shite tiote's nutz" just spouted.

how about "right lads, i'm off and never coming back'?

happy birthday my pink vest wearing brother

god, that would be even more sickening than him going to liverpool

yikes! glad to hear you're alright mate.

i'd go to vegas on your way home. it's the best way to round off any trip to the states. going on somewhere else after will probably feel like an anticlimax