Monkeys Fist

Bellamy?

No

Who was the first man to score for six clubs in the Champions League, but he has never won the competition – and he has played for five clubs that have won it .

Nottingham Forest, couldn’t tell you after that

Is it Peter Withe?

Atlee- Labour PM for the next six years. Hugely important figure in the creation of the Welfare State- it boils my piss that everyone knows of Über Cunts like Thatcher but Atlee is criminally under appreciated.

I’m off to my shed.

The Mrs. and her mates are having a Zoom party. It’s like 100 chickens squawking in a dustbin. Kill me now.

Anything less than 70 bpm

It fell off when I dipped it in the batter.

They normally put him in to sleep mode, do their thing, then boot him up again.

Turned out ok, considering I’ve got neither a deep-fat fryer or a thermometer so it was all done in big pan, old skool. Had a genuine CT moment with the batter- no lager, (and am I baallz wasting good beer on batter), so chucked leftover Prosecco in Worked a treat.

Every fucker else has too- can I fuck get bakers yeast anywhere

I’ve found several apps that can tell you how to get to hospital, for a very reasonable monthly subscription. Yuzacar or Gettabus are mint. £7.99 a month.

Is he a former foot soldier of the Toon Army?

Making Fish and Chips for tea tonight. Russet spuds for the chips, skins left on, just blanched them off for their first fry. Beer batter for the fish ( got Cod and Haddock fillet), I might even make some Mandelson Guacamole later, but doubtful because I fucking hate mushy peas

As if it’s not bad enough having Corona virus, we’re all going to die in a fucking shed in sunderland. These are the End Times

Renton , don’t read this, you’ll have a conniption. https://www.chroniclelive.co.uk/news/north-east-news/chi-onwurah-questions-plan-northern-18066252.amp

Following the above argument, shouldn’t Rees Mogg and his elite MP chums be paying the costs of the less well-off MPs to avoid this kind of fucking joke? https://www.thelondoneconomic.com/politics/mps-given-an-extra-10000-to-work-from-home/09/04/?fbclid=IwAR1x-OQ3GgJmCaGdqmIq1EOf5eCcdYeXZ3jezApGcMsFY845AuB06aqHDcA

You’re not entirely wrong mate, I mostly agree with you, but I fail to see how the it’s the responsibility of PL footballers to cover their colleagues wages, when it should have been the responsibility of their mutual employer. More to the point, I fail to see why people can’t see that they’re being used as outrage sponges to deflect anger away from the Govt’s criminal handling of this crisis.

I watched about 30 seconds of that then ran outside and started licking all the neighbour’s door handles.

Do you know what the original question was? If, as I suspect, it was along the lines of “should Premier League footballers take a pay cut to cover their lesser-paid club colleague’s wages” then he could’ve said ” That’s not really for me to say, I’m the Health Secretary”

I won’t mention the totally coincidental fact that a lot of these lads are working class, or black, or both. Curious that Hancock isn’t asking his white, upper-class paymasters working in banking and finance, who’ll be raking in similar eye-bleeding amounts in wages, to even think about contributing anything. Total coincidence though.

Bloke at the top of my street succumbed to the virus last night. I wanted to let his wife know we were thinking of her, but obviously didn’t want to get too close, since she’s probably got it too. ( brutal reality right there). So I knocked on the door then moved back down the path, and as she opened the door I looked at her and said, “ Plethora” She said, “ Thanks , that means a lot.”