Monkeys Fist

It was the way she held his season ticket.

That’s the bastard! The size of her fiver! You could build a couple of new-build housing estates on the thing. Nae chebs, like.

Just heard that Roy Ayers died last week, aged 84. Fucking legend. Here’s him at 77 doing a Small Desk Concert. He does a tasty version of his most well-known track from 16:00 onwards, but if you can’t be arsed with that, here it is

I can’t remember the name of the lass who brought him down, but she looked like she’d had Bell’s Palsy and also had an absolute fivehead. Presumably registered blind, too.

100% guarantee that our resident bitcoin expert has eaten more than one tin of that.

As is often the case with these feckin’ eejits, they’ll take a harmless fact- powdered aluminium was tested, mildly successfully in the 60s, as a cloud seeder to encourage rainfall, and then put it through the loony tunes mill and come out with a completely arse-backwards, tooth-looseningly stupid “theory” which, surprise-surprise, is the Shadow Gubmint’s doing but only the “enlightened” realise.

Which of the following peer-reviewed scientific sites did he use to do his research? Facebook, Tik Tok or Twatter?

Tell her to ask for directions from wherever the game is back to her house- she’s been there before, shouldn’t be a problem. Then get the fucking airhead to reverse the directions.

It means CT has just moved one rung up the pyramid scheme he’s been trying to flog us for months by recruiting Trump.

You’ll have no pictures soon.

Calling that goatse is a bit of a stretch, mind.

I think the punters in the Flying Scotsman would be very welcoming

The Perminator was popular

Hungover like a bastard. Mam’s funeral yesterday and the drinks kept coming afterwards. Ouch

Remind me.

Whaaaat?

Who gave you permission to post pics of my son???

I regard it as an industry award night- I’d definitely not watch the North East Parking Control Annual Award Dinner, live from the Village Hotel in West Allotment. I view the Oscars the same way, as it’s the same thing. Granted, with nicer tiddies.

Nice to see the reasonable side of the population haven’t totally given up hope.

I’m actually quite grateful for my Mam’s impeccable timing in pegging it- takes my mind off the other shitstorms flying around.

Brutal! but

Anybody else watch this all the way through waiting for Danny Dyer to pop up?

Seriously- arrange to meet on the train, have little daisy chain, get it out of your systems lads.

Straight back at ya