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if you heard a joke today, post it


Dr Gloom
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Whats 4 inches long and goes in one direction?

 

 

Louis Walsh's cock

;)

 

He is going to have a massive dong in a few days.

:lol:

Reminds me of the old 'Jeremy Beadle has a massive cock, but then on the other hand it isn't very big'.

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Whats 4 inches long and goes in one direction?

 

 

Louis Walsh's cock

;)

 

He is going to have a massive dong in a few days.

:lol:

Reminds me of the old 'Jeremy Beadle has a massive cock, but then on the other hand it isn't very big'.

 

The wanking claw! ;)

 

That and i heard somebody use, "I'm sweating like Jeremy Beadle in a glove shop!" once as a variation on the usual expressions for that!

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Whats 4 inches long and goes in one direction?

 

 

Louis Walsh's cock

;)

 

He is going to have a massive dong in a few days.

:lol:

Reminds me of the old 'Jeremy Beadle has a massive cock, but then on the other hand it isn't very big'.

;)

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One day, the beautiful, but dim, Lady Muck knocked on the Vicarage door. "Hello Lady Muck", said the sly old Vicar, "What can I do for you, today?"

 

 

"Well, Vicar, I just had a builder round my house and I called him a Fucking Bastard!"

 

 

"My goodness, Lady Muck! Whatever did the chap do to induce you to utter such ungodly foul language?", Said the Vicar.

 

 

"Well, Vicar, I made him a cup of tea and also a cucumber sandwich and as I gave him them he started to fondle my breasts!"

 

 

The horny old Vicar spotted his chance to take advantage of the beautiful but dippy toff. "Hmmnnn......Do you mean like this", he said as he groped the Lady's jubblies.

 

 

"Yes Vicar! It was exactly like that!"

 

 

"No, Lady Muck, I'm afraid I can't condone such obscene and filthy language, did he, errm, did he do anything else?" He asked with a gleam in his eye.

 

 

"Yes Vicar! He pulled my dress up, pulled my knickers down and started to give me one from behind!"

 

 

Bingo! Thought the sly, horny old Vicar as a smile slowly crept over his face. "Do you mean like this?" Said the Vicar as he lifted up the dippy toffs dress and pullled down her knickers and started to have sex from behind with the Lady.

 

 

"Yes Vicar! It was exactly like that" She said as she turned her head to look at the now panting old Goat.

 

 

"No Lady Muck, I'm....errr......afraid I still can't.....(pant).....can't condone such.....(pant)......such frightful language", he replied.

 

 

Sensing his impending climax the dirty Vicar asked Lady Muck, "Did he, err.....(pant).....did he do anything......(groan)......else......My beautiful Lady?"

 

 

"Yes Vicar", She replied, "He told me he had acute Herpes and full blown Gonorrhea"

 

 

The Vicar replied;

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"THE FUCKING BASTARD!!!!!"

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  • 2 weeks later...
I was in bed with my new girlfriend last night, and she said I'd got the biggest willy she'd ever laid her hands on...

 

I said, you're pulling my leg!

 

2m7yjgk.jpg

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