Dazzler

That Luton keeper has looked mint every time I've seen him. What a save that was.

That was better. Fucking hell man

We're second to every ball at the minute. We really need to do better.

Cracking that with the advertising boards. Lovely touch.

So did Sheffield until the first goal went in tbf.

Na, I think he is. He pretty much said he had a part to play here long term. I only think it goes up in the air if we need to be a bit more cautious with FFP in the summer.

14 stone of fat mess by the evening of Christmas Day, as my dinner and the alcohol mix to form the most powerful laxative in the universe. The IBS helps too like.

Ooh unfortunately that's incorrect. The answer I was looking for was "more Guinness" but thanks for playing

You got anything for the Guinness shits? My plan went a bit rogue on me.

I'm just waiting for the nod at my office window from the gaffer to indicate that he's fine if I fuck off early. I'm pretty much done work wise - there's no-one else in to give me anything to do. I'm even holding in a piss to the point I can barely contain it just to add some stress and excitement to my day when I inevitably have to lump 15 stone of fat-mess at a world record speed to the bog to avoid the shame and embarrassment of pissing myself at work again.

Howe on the injuries: Botman fine and in contention to start. Schar/Big Joe not too serious after their scans Isak is 50/50 Gordon is sore after that cunt of a tackle and Krafth had to have stitches in his shin after Colwill stamped on him. Also said Hall hasn't hit the criteria required to make his loan permanent but said that he has a part to play in the here and now as well as the long term. Also, non-committal on Phillips coming in Jan - as he normally is on transfers anyway. Sticking with my 8-0 prediction

"Where's my ho, ho ho's at?"

I thought it was down to it being frequented by a bunch of blokes, most of whom will be panic shopping at this moment in time, as they thought the weekend would be a fucking nightmare - whinging about queues, "why aren't these cunts at work?" etc.

Behind The Scenes - Michael Beale's First Day | RTG Sunderland Message Boards (readytogo.net) The mackems don't appreciate a good powerpoint. Won't lie though, some of the comments have tickled me so I am off to have a bath in bleach.

FYP

Seeds - fair enough Quiche - you can get fucked Carrot cake - you can get fucked Carrot juice - Is that a thing? If so, fair enough. Spam - fair enough, but meat in a tin?! Corned Beef?! - you can get fucked. Jungle - What? Nut Burgers - fair enough.

Especially when he had one hand behind his head and the Prittstick in the other hand. Have we considered ghosts?

So they have developed a system that will ensure that the top clubs stay at the top, regardless of their league form - So the ESL is the footballing equivalent of FFP. Yeah, go fuck yourself ESL. The only real way to get into the "star" league is to be one of the current biggest teams in Europe as you'll be invited in. It all feels very American - like the NFL etc, just a pure unadulterated parcel of shit that no one asked for.

Spoken like a man who's never enjoyed a few pints of Stella and suddenly realised his wife talks too much. Shame on you.

Veg shops.

If they show them for free then the sponsorship must be fucking nuts. We'll have ESL strips covered head to toe in logos, players forced to have tattoos of sponsors. and the awful American thing of: "This set piece is brought to by....." every free kick, corner, pen, goal kick etc. Sounds fucking dreadful tbh.