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Ironically we're pretty experienced at surviving plagues that strike us down at will. Maybe the religious nuts should consult us.

I'd be very surprised if they let him wear his shoes into the ICU. Look, MF isn't here, someone's got to do it.

More cans mate.

No ranking for me, loads of clubs get on my tits to differing degrees and circumstances. I still don't like Stevenage from the 1998 cup tie.

People are out enjoying themselves

I might have a look if I get the chance, Wykiki.

Heck of a post preview, that.

The Big Sam of politics?

The problem with tories is the next one along is always a bigger dickhead, particularly Raab who actually has penis veins all over his head. Get well soon Boris m9

Tier 1: mackems Tier 2: Man Utd, Liverpool Tier 3: The grudges - Hereford, Stevenage, Forest, Villa, Sheff Wed Tier 4: All the bigger London teams including Palace. Tier 5: Everyone else.

In his defence, he was batshit crazy

He'll be out and about sabotaging 5G towers

We'll see tomorrow and the rest of the week. When you're back to being chicken licken.

It’s not fun but it’s manageable for now. We had a run of patients deteriorating and needing intubation for ventilation last weekend (I did 2 in one night and there was 2 the next shift) and I thought that was going to be the start of the madness but it eased off in ITU although general admissions are ramping up. We’ve since had a couple we’ve managed to wean off the ventilator and more that have died. We’re now treating any patient that comes to surgery as Covid positive which means full PPE and protocol. It’s like walking into the lion’s den every night not knowing what you’ll be facing. The worst thing so far was hearing a relative screaming at my colleague down the phone when he was told he couldn’t visit his dying mother. She was called a heartless bitch and various other things and he threatened to kick his way into the department. I totally get it but it’s heartbreaking and mentally and emotionally exhausting.

In fairness, that would be mint. I love Wyki’s workplace tales of woe. An entire forum of Wyki types, about to go full Columbine on their workmates, would make for great reading.

No mention was made of the reporters sent to out the Scottish doctor by spying on her.

Jesus, Renton. You find the negative in everything

Assuming this Toby jug of piss knows something we don’t, aye.

Turns out that as well as being a filthy minx, she was a despatch rider in London during WWII. What a woman. RIP

Just a thought aswell. If he’s been on a general Covid ward then it’s likely to be a 15:1 patient to nurse ratio. ITU gets him 1:1 care. Or it did until this past couple of weeks.. And they can do fancy tests like ABG’s (arterial blood gases) to check his respiratory function based on the levels of CO2 in his blood, thus being able to detect further deterioration far more quickly than if he was ward-based. If the ABG results show rapidly deteriorating resp function then ventilation will be required whilst the docs try to correct everything with the patient under anaesthesia. And I can guarantee that every nurse the Tories have shafted for years will do absolutely everything they can for him. As they should.

I hate everyone but slightly unusually & very strongly Leicester bastard City

I dislike Man U far more than Liverpool, take away the pundits bullshit about them and their ex-players and I'm not that arsed either way. There's a proper arrogance about Man U that just fucking grates and that's just the fans. Then you come to the likes of Chelsea and Arsenal. Not for me, Clive. Cockney wankers with short memories. Everton are a strange bunch, met the odd decent one but the social media fans are up there with the very worst and are the closest thing I've ever seen to a mirror image of Sunderland fans. Villa, say no more. Leeds, Boro etc are proper fucking divvies but off the radar when you don't play them. That's just off the top of my head as I'm busy.

I don’t really like any football club but I especially hate Newcastle United.

Fuckin' hate Burton !!! Hang on..no i don't, in fact i fuckin' LOVE BURTON

Imagine how FOP is feeling. God rest his soul.

To be fair to the makers they’ve done a great job at showing just how much it means to the fans and the local community so when see the disappointment on their little faces it’s that much funnier.

Look at Billy Big Bollocks here with his own flatpack stadium…

Cheers @catmag, if you need a back rub or owt give me a tinkle ( seriously though, it’s unbelievable work you’re all doing- my sis-in-law is also a nurse at Wansbeck and she has had a very similar time. I honestly don’t know how you do it. )

I'm aware of the weekend artefact effect but I maintain it hasn't exploded as bad as I had feared. We're now in the time period where the lock down will be having an effect. I know there's a hell of a long way to go and things may get worse before they get better.But they will get better. Also I'm hoping theNE has escaped the worst of it.

Bloody kills me when Gemmill is right 😆

Probably delays in reporting deaths to PHE by the hospitals due to operational pressures/reduced admin staff etc.

sounds more like lung cancer than cv19 tbh mate

5 years till next election....best keep the Blair contingent away to begin with? 🤔

Bridget makes the shadow cabinet.

WAKE UP SHEEPLE.

If you let Trump get a second term because of your left wing (or any other type of misguided) principles, I'm not calling you "stupid", I'm calling you a fucking pathetic martyr cunt. The question these fucking bellwhiffs (assuming they exist) need to ask themselves is, on balance, what will come closer to delivering a fairer society for those less fortunate. I'm not saying what will DELIVER it, I'm saying what will be least damaging to them. The answer isn't Trump. So if you let him get back in because you're so very principled, then you can top yourself as far as I'm concerned.

This is a really interesting thread about how conventional journalists play into Trump's hands at these press conferences, and what the solution to the problem is (which will likely be ignored).

I just don't get this. Let's allow Trump back in because their man did not win. While I concede that Sanders' supporters wanted more progressive policies than they would get with Biden, surely you get rid of Trump first and then push for change from within. Morons! I suppose it was similar with Corbyn - that went well

Desperate to see a picture of the newly bloated Renton though. Fat as Johnson?! Fuuuucking hell, someone's embracing middle age.

There's going to be a round of applause for couriers and delivery drivers. It will be some time tomorrow between 9am and 5pm.

I was up a ladder with a chain saw yesterday and escaped unscathed so I think I’ve used up all my luck.

They’ve closed the car parks near all parks in my town. There’s a baseball field across the road from my block of flats, some huckle goes there and smokes a cigarette in the car park there (usually see him when I’m waking my dog around the field). So now it’s closed he just pulled up in the parking spot under my flats balcony with some horrific music blaring out his Audi and stood in the car park smoking, serial killer behavior this. The bloke needs to man up and own up to his other half that he smokes before I egg the weird cunt.

Ain't no pun shame.

I don’t know though. He’ll be fucking unbearable if he pulls through

RT if like Ayatollah's post. Like if you don't. Enough likes and I'll put a pic of myself watching Duty free. (It's all about me at the end of the day).

Good point. The media are different though. Largely because the media say so. They mostly make the rules. Piers Morgan would be a good person to ask

I know, I know, I know, I know.

Tommy Lee, erstwhile drummer with Uber poodle rock practitioners Motley Crue and world class sex tape shagger, has shared this essay about the respect and deep affection the nation has for their President: I think this screed has been updated to reflect more recent Trumpfuckwittery. Note: This was written by Craig Alan Wilkins and shared into popularity by Tommy Lee. "An Open Letter to the president"....... A re-tweet from Mötley Crüe drummer, Tommy Lee, who soooooo wins the literary scribe of the day award........🤘🏽🤩🥳🤩🤘🏽 : "Dear Fucking Lunatic, At your recent press conference - more a word salad that had a stroke and fell down stairs, you were CLEARLY so out of your depth you needed scuba gear. Within minutes of going off air, your minions were backpedaling faster than Cirque De Soliel acrobats... In India a week ago, i couldn’t get past the bit about your being the most popular visitor in the history of fucking India — a country of a BILLION human souls that’s only 3000 years old, give or take.!!! Trust me - Gandhi pulled CROWDS.. You pulled a cricket stadium and half WALKED out... Do you know how fucking insane you sound, you off-brand butt plug? That's like the geopolitical equivalent of “that stripper really likes me” — only 10,000 times crazier and less self-aware. You are fucking exhausting. Every day is a natural experiment in determining how long 300 million people can resist coring out their own assholes with an ice auger. Every time I hear a snippet of your Queens-tinged banshee larynx farts, I want to scream! We are fucking tired. As bad as we all thought your presidency would be when Putin got you elected, it’s been inestimably worse. You called a hostile, nuclear-armed head of state “short and fat.” How the fuck does that help? You accused a woman — a former friend, no less — of showing up at your resort bleeding from the face and begging to get in. You, you, YOU — the guy who looks like a Christmas haggis inexplicably brought to life by Frosty’s magic hat — yes, you of all people said that. You attempted — with evident fucking glee — to get 24 million people thrown off their health insurance. You gave billions away to corporations and the already wealthy while simultaneously telling struggling poor people that you were doing exactly the opposite. You endorsed a pedophile, praised brutal dictators, and defended LITERAL FUCKING NAZIS! Ninety-nine percent of everything you say is either false, crazy, incoherent, just plain cruel, or a rancid paella of all four. Oh, by the way, Puerto Rico is still FUBAR. You got yourself and your family billions in tax breaks for Christmas. What do they get? More paper towels? Enough, enough, enough, enough! For the love of God and all that is holy, good, and pure, would you please, finally and forever, shut your feculent KFC-hole until you have something valuable — or even marginally civil — to say? You are a fried dick sandwich with a side of schlongs. If chlamydia and gonorrhea had a son, you’d appoint him HHS secretary. You are a disgraceful, pustulant hot stew full of casuistry, godawful ideas, unintelligible non sequiturs, and malignant rage. You are the perfect circus orangutan diaper from Plato’s World of Forms. So fuck you Mr. President. And fuck you forever. Oh, and Pence, you oleaginous house ferret. Fuck you, too. You'll be as useful as a chocolate teapot against a medical crisis you Bible thumping cock socket."