Howmanheyman

........And you may find yourself in a shiny new stadium........And you may find yourself in a plastic grey seat.......And you may find yourself in a sportsdirect advert heaven.........And you may find yourself in a wonga football shirt, with a owner who's a cunt........and you may think to yourself........well, how did I get here?

You can overspend as long as it falls within a 3 year budget, your punishment is some time out of Europe I believe? It's ok if you had cash injections before a certain date, Chelsea, Man City etc are fucking cushty darza. What a joke.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s6EaoPMANQM

Just got the Sopranos box set today, I almost feel like CT.

That's all well and good but let's see the bit where she tries to throw the ball, eh?

"Oh for fuck sake, do keep up, you're missing the whole point of the superhero genre let alone the dark and quirky machinations of the directors cut of the Batman series."

I wish KSA's 'Bravado Dave' impression was still around as indeed KSA himself!

Walking back from a school disco with my 8 year old daughter; Me: "Who's that you've just waved to?" Nicole: "Nicole such and such." Me: "Is she in your class or the next one?" Nicole: "Mine." Me: "I don't recognise her or her Mam." Nicole: "What's your name?" Me: "David." Nicole: "What's this? (pointing to her nose)." Me: "A nose." Nicole: "What's in your hands?" I turn my hands over. Me: "Nothing." Nicole: "David knows nothing." Cheeky little git!

Wife this morning while I'm enjoying the sun in the back on my day off; Wife: "We need to take some stuff back to Asda then Silverlink" Me: "(sigh) Alright then." We finish taking some kids stuff back to asda then.... Wife: "That bag there is for Matalan." (in Killingworth). Me: "You never said Matalan." Wife: "Well it needs to go back today." Me: "(sigh) Alright then." We then pull up to River Island in the Silverlink, I grab two bags out the boot....... Wife: "No! Just the red bag!" Me: "What?" Wife: "The black bag is to go back to 'New look'" Me: Wife: "What's wrong......blah, blah......(twenty minutes later).........blah blah......." Me: "Honestly, I don't mind going to these shops and dropping them all off, it's nee bother."

Not 'Bravado' anymore?

I don't know why everybody is so worried, after all we've got a billionaire owner and at least £60M extra coming our way in television revenue. I'm sure Joe and Mike will see us alright.

Couldn't you have just run it off you big puff? Call yersel a Geordie? Great news, Mac!

"His FA Cup and League cup record with us is atrocious." might have been an even better way to put it.

"Hi, Mike, err, Boss, err sir, Lol! (OMG!!! i'm talking to Mike Ashley!!) This is Lisa from Sportsdirect News, our readers would really, really like to know what is, like, going to happen with, you know, Papiss Cisse and stuff, you know?"

Whatever the famous person said.

"His FA Cup and League cup record is atrocious." might have been a better way to put it.

I tell you what, If it's someone famous who's saying it then that's me convinced.

He's shit in the cups. Trust me.

I don't know the sex, weight etc that the new royal baby will be but I do know that it'll be born with a silver spoon hanging out of it's mouth rather than a greggs sausage roll.

Is he not a bit young for chardonnay? I'd start him off with alcopops first, Cat.

67.4% (Meenzer completely exaggerates the numbers).

It depends what my potential students are willing to pay!