Ayatollah Hermione

If “It could be worse” is the first yardstick we have for measuring potential Prime Ministers, then everything is absolutely fucked

Mitrovic would have definitely got himself retroactively suspended sooner than Slimani anyway

Anything to do with playing and listening to music, reading and attempting to find the motivation to actually write things. I always think I should have a more niche hobby though. Games are about as close as I get and even then, I think the wider culture around them is embarrassing.

Just passed Renton's house there and he's that angry, his stained glass windows are steamed up

I love, LOVE, that he's tight as owt as well. Years of splashing out on shite while abusing our transfer policy (which is fair game tbf) is going to seem like paradise compared to what is going to get served up here. I still think they'll piss League One like but that's more due to the league being shite and them being the biggest name in it by a mile

How is buying this wooden pallet sofa monstrosity a hobby? More Dear Diary shite

Better order a second season of that documentary

Eastleigh. Where did he flog the club? On Craigslist?

Just, in general

Love to have other fans tell us they know better about our club than us. It's dead endearing

When he came on yesterday, Dubravka knocked it long towards the front two. The ball is hurtling over toward Joselu and Dawson and Joselu was looking over to Slimani to see if he was going to challenge for it. Another one of our players who is probably a good lad but is absolutely thick as fuck in footballing terms.

I blame him for Fish's stat wanking. He should be forced to come back and apologise

Pretty shocking performance all in all from a team who look like they're on their holidays. Nobody stood out but I will say that Yedlin is absolutely desperate. A right-back is a clear priority in the summer. Perez had another game where every second touch was a foul and nowt was sticking to Gayle. Slimani looked a bit lively when he came on but fuck me, you get someone on loan who's injured, they get a setback, then another setback and then he kicks someone and risks a retrospective 3 game ban, thus finishing his season. A fine piece of business there, all thanks to Ashley pissing about all January. Still, West Brom are far from the worst side in the league. Rondon and Rodriguez are a handful, Phillips had a canny game and their back four dealt with things pretty well, I thought. It's a testament to Alan Pardew's managerial abilities that they're bottom and the likes of Huddersfield and Swansea are probably looking at another season in the top flight. Anyway, get the season done with and start the World Cup.

I'll be honest; sometimes I just like being awkward for the sake of it

We probably freed up more money by getting Siem De Jong off the books, man

I took a fiver on him anytime and 3-0. Also, got 14-1 on him to score a header and be carded

Fish, how can we spend £5 million that we haven't got yet?

On the point of better jobs coming available, the West Brom job became available about 6 days after he was appointed at Sunderland At a time in the season where they could have easily been salvaged.

Genuinely amazed they’re all still alive. Good on them

and now a new generation will have the same but with Kane and Alli looking gutted

A pal of mine is a Sunderland season ticket holder and he says they’re all shite but they can occasionally rise above that to “not quite shite” A ringing endorsement that I’ll listen to. And more pertinently, he reckons they’ll get fuck all for any of them

Not to mention the mess they inherited from Labour

They were all just shite. Thauvin has talent but it was never going to work over here and, perhaps more crucially, he didn’t seem willing to put the effort into adapting

Fingers crossed