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Tourist Guide to Dundee

But that's enough about your wife.

I’ve just been fucking Shanghaied in to agreeing to “view” a fucking dog. I am not a happy bunny- I am fundamentally opposed to pets, and yet I know that within a month, I will be ultimately responsible for picking up the rancid shite of a fucking animal I don’t want in any shape or form. FML.

He'll be working through his box sets man. "Ahl dee all the Monster Munch first."

Chill Out by KLF has been one of my go-to albums for longer than I care to remember- I first had it on cassette in France, then a ripped CD which got lost in my travels, and for a long time I didn’t have it. It’s been available on YouTube for a few years, all because Drummond and Cauty deleted it from their catalogue years ago, so it’s only been dodgy copies. Anyway, after that preamble, they’ve finally released a remixed version this year on stream, it’s virtually exactly the same, some samples removed, some added, just added it to my Apple Music catalogue. ( ironically, the easiest way for me to share it here is via YouTube, so…) Edit, - On review, it’s more than just a few “small changes”- whilst it’s essentially the same, it’s not the Classic album , Why do artists do this- fuck around with their well loved stuff?

No idea what’s being discussed now. Which is an improvement on talking about NUFC

Cuntception

Because his boss is a bigger cunt.

Well, I've been into comics for over 30yrs and I've done loads of sexing.

First it’s cabbages and now it’s swedes. Will someone rid me of these meddlesome root vegetables?

Speaking on a weekly basis here, on average, how often do you fuck your sister-mam?

Just me, forever having to hurdle those five-metre-long dog leads when I'm out on a run.

I’ve been told we’re getting a black Labrador puppy when the house is all done up.... then there will be nobody on the planet left who don’t own a fuckin mutt

Why a Model T was driven to the top of Ben Nevis http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-highlands-islands-44003271

Oozes, you say?

I’d bet people any money that, when he’s sitting on his arse in the house, him or none of his little cronies are watching Saturday’s match or any of Spurs’ last few games. Probably sitting with ITV Racing on all day.

Today I am greatly enjoying this extremely fucking stupid album

So Ashley is repaying his ‘loyalty’

It’s the way he tells em

It probably not appropriate to say but I love LBT’s, they are amazing!

Reported. Call me naive, but I thought Nobby only blew his own trumpet.

That’s enough. It’s getting worse every day with now having people like Collymore being sympathetic. Fuck off.

As long as you play every match at home.

Sending you so much love and strength Renton. I’m so sorry you’re going through this. 😢

I thought he was fantastic during Liverpool’s recent height. Can barely recall him losing the ball but nearly every pass was positive.

Are you havaianas on?

The only conclusion that anyone watching that game on Saturday can come to is that these players are not playing for Bruce now. The supposed tactics are beyond ridiculous, since Wilsons injury we've strikers as wingers and wingers as strikers. He's fell out with Ritchie and probably others and he's made ridiculous statements about the likes of Carroll and Murphy. It's absolutely no wonder they don't trust him and and it's plain to see. Obviously there is a sizeable possibility that Ashley didn't bother watching the match at all but given his investment in the club he surely has been asking questions of someone as to what the fuck is going on. He may well like the fact that unlike Rafa, Bruce won't say a bad word against him but surely that can't go so far as to allow him to reduce the value of his asset by £100m? I'm firmly of the opinion that Ashley doesn't give a fuck about the club but he keeps telling us that he doesn't have £100's of millions in cash and that his wealth is just a paper asset value. Reducing that value to such an extent that it either makes selling impossible or hits him in the pocket at a time he seems to want the cash cannot be something he's happy to just go along with. The only sense I can make from this is that he's happy to see us relegated for some reason. Whether that's because he's a cunt with a grudge against us or (far less likely imo) he has some deal struck that will get him the money he wants regardless of the division we're in and he thinks he can get the football league to approve the new owners far easier than the premier league will. The above both seem completely unbelievable to me now but they seem far more plausible than anyone thinking Steve Bruce can save us from relegation now. The only thing that can keep us up now that they've chosen to stick with this disgusting fraud of a man is Fulham somehow doing worse than us for the rest of the season. No matter how badly Brighton or Burnley might do, I can't see us winning another game with him in charge let alone doing enough to overtake either of them.

FAO @The Fish

A couple of complete different must listens.

Landmark day tomorrow as we get a new Sting album AND a new Ringo Starr album. Now That’s What I Call Brexit!