Leaderboard

**** REBREAKING NEWS **** THE RED HOT MITCH SUMMER HAS COMMENCED We've signed Ivan Cordoba, no wait, Antonio Cordero from Spanish GIANTS, Madrid, Malaga. BIG MITCH had this to say: "This is what I call fit for purpose. An abundance of potential. Eddie can look forward to news of him coming to training in 12 months time, before he's onsold to some one else for a small profit. To be honest it's patronising that they're making me comment on this small time signing when they've already tapped me on the shoulder and told everyone that I wasn't cutting it, but I suppose I have to at least keep pretending so they have to keep paying me."

You're not in work now. There's no pay rise for licking the bossman's hoop.

Well yesterday I finished my first 'week' at the new gaff. I say 'week' as I do four day weeks. I couldn't have asked for a better start tbh. They seem a cracking bunch. The atmosphere in the office is bob on, relaxed but everyone is grafting and helping each other out. Its the first time I have been a manger of someone with more industry experience than me and I was a little nervous about that. However, the lad is absolutely spot on. We did an internal workshop on my second day about the business. The gaffer was leading it but we all got involved. He then asked for someone to stand up and give a small review on the discussion we just had. I thought fuck it I'll do it. I want to push myself out of my comfort zone in this role. Anyways, I did and was bricking it but soon calmed down Anyways, weekend in the Lakes with the lads now and onwards and upwards.

Nailed it. I was asked by someone if I was on Linkedin yesterday and I said no. He asked why and I said it was full shite like 'Whilst dropping off Tarquin at nursery this morning in the Aston, he asked if he could give some of his pocket money to the homeless guy out of the window. It was such a heart warming moment. I then dropped him off with a gold plated nappy and with a glow in my heart' Anyways, after I said that he seemed a little disappointed

Congrats Wyki. There's nowt better way to win friends and influence people than being the new guy and being a "pushing my comfort zone" linked-in speak twat and getting up and showing off in front of the gaffer first chance you get. I hope if there were areas needing further discussion you said you'd take it offline, circle back and touch base later. 😉

Wor lass had an interview today. She asked me to help her prepare. I asked ChatGPT to come up with a list of likely questions in that field. The interviewers apparently did the same. The questions they asked were pretty much word for word. Maybe I WILL get a BJ this year after all!

At this point I’m cheering for the asteroid

"So lad says, 'Wykikeh, are you on that linkedin?', ah says, 'Linkedin? Tha'd have to be right twat to be on that shit show, you're not on it are you?' He then looked a bit sheepish so I told him that anyone on LinkedIn, ah wouldn't be showing them a bird's nest, the absolewte wrong'uns they are!"

This spat caused a rush of people going on Trump's Truth Social site and ended up revealing what everyone already knew.

Excited that we are in contract talks for renewals with Wilson, Ruddy and Gillespie.

He won't read that mate, he's taking a break from the forum.

"FTM!!! MAGEDIA, MARRAS!!! MAGEDIA!!!

*googles two high agency males going at it*

They haven't factored in the £250m prize money for winning last seasons Sela Cup.

The official accounts from the club have been desperately trying to make this into a big deal We’re absolutely starved for a proper signing like

The electric cars that no one wanted? Like the one Trump bought a couple of months ago? It's going to be amusing watching two absolute thundercunts trying to destroy each other.

Another enquiry made for Elanga according to Hope. I think he’d be a very good signing and is tailor made for an Eddie Howe team but in a PSR world, I question the wisdom of paying £50 million for him. I felt the same with Guehi for £65 million last year too. Seems ridiculous to complain about PSR headroom every year and exclusively shop in the most expensive market

Gillespie is basically the kid that befriends De Nero in that advert but expanded to the whole of NUFC.

Speaking of which

Just got sent this it’s quite funny especially at the end with the Mackem

I love the blasé attitude that just assumes King Trump would be reliable.

And that’s your alibi, is it?

That and the fact she’s a successful politician

This sums up Trump's America - "I didn't bother reading what I was voting on, just voted for it because Trump said it was big and beautiful". Fuckwit. Actually, the fact that it is even called the "One Big Beautiful Bill Act" properly sums up Trump's America.

That’s annoying. I was looking forward to playing against his suicidal high line again next season to see if things were still fair and equal

Who's that daft cunt? (Poso, not Tom).

As always Andrew, thanks we are massively grateful of the work you do man.

Thebrokencunt?

Aye, Musk is finding that out now. Sounds like the two of them are going head to head.

why does the board keep breaking then? and what the fuck's a discord?

Cheers, just splurted coffee

Devastating incident at East Boldon station this morning

If that isn’t the hot Mitch summer, I don’t know what is

That explains why Wayne is now so fat.

Irregardless of what, he's made his bed and now will have to deal with the consequences.

That last screenshot They’re a fanbase who spent a 10 page thread inventing stories about how every football fan in London bent over backwards to fellate them last week but we’re the needy ones

Contract extended to 2027 when he'll be 35. As it should be.