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Prince Charles is isolating at Balmoral with Covid-19. Prince Andrew is isolating at Windsor with Jennifer-14.

Either that or “yes Gemmill”.

I remember going fucking mental when that Bellamy goal went in.

This line in the BBC report about Prince Jug Ears. ”It's not a huge house but certainly big enough to isolate yourself within it. “ Edit: you are seeing half of it in the pic.

✊️

The union is putting their foot down with our place, thank fuck. The great irony being that I won our “Nominate a Mate” scheme for being diligent in cleaning surfaces etc and the prize is a voucher for a shopping centre where fuck all is open for the next 6 month

They just can’t catch a break

Lads, do you not think Renton has enough work on?

I mean, I dread to think what you can get on the premium edition you can't on the normal?!

Yeah him & Camilla got tested after getting mild symptoms but frontline medics don’t. Fuckin love this country me

Six words and you butchered a third of them.

Someone’s getting desperate for arse wipes.

Get people from Wetherspoons to do their job? Can I just add what a cunt Martin is. Not Meenzer btw. Strange how in these times of national emergency the Brexit loons have turned out to be selfish cunts, isn't it?

I’m getting my head pecked from both sides, from bosses saying the government guidance allows them to keep sites open and loads on site saying they don’t feel comfortable/safe. Measures have been put into place but sites aren’t the most hygienic places in the world at the best of times. My more switched on contractors have shut their sites willingly but I still have 4 sites open and working. Its a shit show tbh

Squires' take on the situation. @PaddockLad you'll know why this is so funny. https://www.theguardian.com/football/ng-interactive/2020/mar/24/david-squires-on-premier-league-managers-under-lockdown

He can't, he has no power over them as long as they're not in violation of federal law. The family and I already left NYC to stay with our in-laws in Pennsylvania, reckoning it'll be safer out here (definitely true, the infection rate in NYC is going nuclear) and also the bairns can actually stretch out and play freely in a proper family house, rather than our third-floor walk-up in the Bronx. I'm teaching from home and the 5-year-old is doing remote learning on the iPad, so all of that seems to be sorted, but I'm worried about my parents. Me dad's restaurant has shut (they don't do delivery) so he's out of work and me mam has a lot of underlying health problems that really would not play well with COVID-19. Things are already bad enough but the moron-in-chief seems determined to make them worse. Dr. Fauci is on the outs and has been replaced by a pathetic dogsbody called Dr. Birx, some joker in a lab coat who would say or do anything Trump told her to. Americans have died from taking "miracle cures" recommended to them by their god-emperor which turned out to (obviously) be fucking fake bullshit. And most worrying of all, the states have postponed a number of primaries and there hangs a vague sort of doubt over whether or not we're going to have an election at all in November. I'm convinced he'd lose - if the country is still a going cornern by then....

Especially since they have a special relationship with all of them. Except Grimsby and Darlington cos they look like mags. FTM!

Be sensible about it. Get a shower and go in their house to check if they are ok. You can still keep 2m away from them and don’t touch anything you don’t have to. Get them a cheap tablet, hook it up to your WiFi and FaceTime them too if needed. You can set the tablet up so that they literally just need to click the green button to answer your call. That’s what we’ve done for my Gran

Ahead of the time tough...

I don't know enough about it, but giving the whole population a vaccine that isn't thoroughly tested at a RCT is how the zombie apocalypse starts in most films

Coronavirus: Off-licences added to list of 'essential' retailers https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-52033260

Would be a positive result if it wiped out those cunts anyway.

Yep. Probably worth seeking medical advice rather than a random from the internet though. I do have a PhD in pharmacology, but probably from before candersartan was invented. There's an excess of deaths associated with hypertension, but this may be due to ACEIs and ARBs rather than the condition itself. Same with diabetes. Quite fascinating really.

I can’t believe Meghan would stoop so low

Yeah we are okay. A bit like your lot, our's aren't taking it to serious and the local tories are making a pig's ear of getting the info out. But as of last night we are in phase 2 lockdown, schools are open but pupils don't have to go (state gov overruled the federal cunts), only essential things are meant to be open but somehow that include hairdressers and shops for shit people just don't need.

pep guardiola donating a million of his own money to help spain's fight against the virus... https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/52028743 meanwhile ashley doubles the price of online skipping ropes after being forced to make a u turn on keeping his tat shops open.

I believe it, even when he was in the mindset of taking advice from the medical professionals for his speech at the weekend he was still saying he won’t mandate nationwide closures as “each state is different” so even though New York, New Jersey, California, Illinois, Washington, etc are shutting down other states don’t give fuck. What is also baffling is how these arrogant pricks don’t understand that if people go out and live normal lives, sacrificing anyone that’s old or compromised, it won’t be long until those in other groups are desperately needing ventilators to stay alive as the hospitals become overwhelmed. What exactly does he think will happen to the economy when that happens? He simply doesn’t give a flying fuck, all he wants is the stock market to be up when it’s election time, outside of that nothing matters. If this doesn’t open people’s eyes to voting in animals like this then nothing will. If he ignores all the medical professionals advice the fall out is going to be fucking horrific, apparently Dr Fauci has been stopped from attending any further press briefings as Trump finally clicked on that Fauci didn’t agree with him.

I bet your wife won’t believe your GAUL when she finds out the truth.

Anyone had their leadership ballot through?... I've just done mine..... Michael Foot & Dennis Healey dream ticket 👍

Talk about an Impedimenta.

“ Oh, right love. I wondered what they were as I couldn’t get the pages open…”

Albert Uderzo, the guy who drew Asterix, broon breed at 92. Loved these comics as a kid, and I’m getting to enjoy them again with my kids.

All you can do is do what you can. Don't forget, your boss is maintaining a line here because he has to. Are they really expecting that there will be no dip in productivity in all this? It's possible, but it's unlikely. But they have to maintain that line to stop people taking the piss. Read the email in that context and then just do the best you can. You are self-evidently not taking the piss and you're not about to start. So just be assured that whatever you can do each day is the best that you can do, and don't stress about the shit that doesn't get done. Zoom out on all of this and you realise that none of this shit matters. The important stuff is what's going on in the hospitals and the people trying to find a vaccine. Everything else is completely irrelevant. Try and remind yourself of this. Seriously, it doesn't matter and its definitely not worth having a breakdown over. Good luck. And I hope this doesn't sound patronising cos I am genuinely concerned about you.

Ventin' Renton. Sounds like a nickname Trump would give him.

Even his choice of memes is unimaginative

You’re an absolute cunt

Renton fucking livid. "EH!? HOW IS THIS CUNT GETTING DAYS OFF? Wait til this morning's video call. I'm doing it fucking shirtless."